"Abe" Lincoln's Anecdotes and Stories: A Collection of the Best Stories Told by Lincoln Which Made Him Famous as America's Best Story Teller — John Shaqi
"Abe" Lincoln's Anecdotes and Stories: A Collection of the Best Stories Told by Lincoln Which Made Him Famous as America's Best Story Teller
History
"Abe" Lincoln's Anecdotes and Stories: A Collection of the Best Stories Told by Lincoln Which Made Him Famous as America's Best Story Teller
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
When Hood's army had been scattered into fragments, President Lincoln,
elated by the defeat of what had so long been a menacing force on
the borders of Tennessee, was reminded by its collapse of the fate
of a savage dog belonging to one of his neighbors in the frontier
settlements in which he lived in his youth. "The dog," he said,
"was the terror of the neighborhood, and its owner, a churlish and
quarrelsome fellow, took pleasure in the brute's forcible attitude.
"Finally, all other means having failed to subdue the creature, a man
loaded a lump of meat with a charge of powder, to which was attached a
slow fuse; this was dropped where the dreaded dog would find it, and
the animal gulped down the tempting bait.
"There was a dull rumbling, a muffled explosion, and fragments of the
dog were seen flying in every direction. The grieved owner, picking up
the shattered remains of his cruel favorite, said: 'He was a good dog,
but as a dog, his days of usefulness are over.' Hood's army was a good
army," said Lincoln by way of comment, "and we were all afraid of it,
but as an army, its usefulness is gone."
=HE'D RUIN ALL THE OTHER CONVICTS=
One of the droll stories brought into play by the President as an
ally in support of his contention, proved most effective. Politics
was rife among the generals of the Union Army, and there was more
"wire-pulling" to prevent the advancement of fellow commanders than
the laying of plans to defeat the Confederates in battle.
However, when it so happened that the name of a particularly unpopular
general was sent to the Senate for confirmation, the protest against
his promotion was almost unanimous. The nomination didn't seem to
please anyone. Generals who were enemies before conferred together
for the purpose of bringing every possible influence to bear upon the
Senate and securing the rejection of the hated leader's name. The
President was surprised. He had never known such unanimity before.
"You remind me," said the President to a delegation of officers
which called upon him one day to present a fresh protest to him
regarding the nomination, "of a visit a certain Governor paid to the
Penitentiary of his State. It had been announced that the Governor
would hear the story of every inmate of the institution, and was
prepared to rectify, either by commutation or pardon, any wrongs that
had been done to any prisoner.
"One by one the convicts appeared before His Excellency, and each one
maintained that he was an innocent man, who had been sent to prison
because the police didn't like him, or his friends and relatives
wanted his property, or he was too popular, etc., etc. The last
prisoner to appear was an individual who was not at all prepossessing.
His face was against him; his eyes were shifty; he didn't have the
appearance of an honest man, and he didn't act like one.
"'Well,' asked the Governor, impatiently, 'I suppose you're innocent
like the rest of these fellows?'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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