"Abe" Lincoln's Anecdotes and Stories: A Collection of the Best Stories Told by Lincoln Which Made Him Famous as America's Best Story Teller
History
"Abe" Lincoln's Anecdotes and Stories: A Collection of the Best Stories Told by Lincoln Which Made Him Famous as America's Best Story Teller
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
"I was with Lincoln once and listened to an oral argument by him in
which he rehearsed an extended history of the law. It was a carefully
prepared and masterly discourse, but, as I thought, entirely useless.
After he was through and we were walking home, I asked him why he
went so far back in the history of the law. I presumed the court knew
enough history.
"'That's where you're mistaken,' was his instant rejoinder. 'I
dared not trust the case on the presumption that the court knows
everything--in fact I argued it on the presumption that the court
didn't know anything,' a statement, which, when one reviews the
decision of our appellate courts, is not so extravagant as one would
at first suppose."
="TAD" GOT HIS DOLLAR=
No matter who was with the President, or how intently absorbed, his
little son "Tad" was always welcome. He almost always accompanied his
father.
Once, on the way to Fortress Monroe, he became very troublesome.
The President was much engaged in conversation with the party who
accompanied him, and he at length said:
"'Tad,' if you will be a good boy, and not disturb me any more until
we get to Fortress Monroe, I will give you a dollar."
The hope of reward was effectual for a while in securing silence, but,
boylike, "Tad" soon forgot his promise, and was as noisy as ever. Upon
reaching their destination, however, he said, very promptly: "Father,
I want my dollar." Mr. Lincoln looked at him half-reproachfully for an
instant, and then, taking from his pocketbook a dollar note, he said:
"Well, my son, at any rate, I will keep my part of the bargain."
=ROUGH ON THE NEGRO=
Mr. Lincoln, one day, was talking with the Rev. Dr. Sunderland about
the Emancipation Proclamation and the future of the negro. Suddenly a
ripple of amusement broke the solemn tone of his voice. "As for the
negroes, Doctor, and what is going to become of them: I told Ben Wade
the other day, that it made me think of a story I read in one of my
first books, 'Æsop's Fables.' It was an old edition, and had curious
rough wood cuts, one of which showed three white men scrubbing a negro
in a potash kettle filled with cold water. The text explained that the
men thought that by scrubbing the negro they might make him white.
Just about the time they thought they were succeeding, he took cold
and died. Now, I am afraid that by the time we get through this war
the negro will catch cold and die."
="LONG ABE'S" FEET "PROTRUDED OVER"=
George M. Pullman, the great sleeping car builder, once told a joke
in which Lincoln was the prominent figure. In fact, there wouldn't
have been any joke had it not been for "Long Abe." At the time of
the occurrence, which was the foundation for the joke--and Pullman
admitted that the latter was on him--Pullman was the conductor of his
only sleeping-car. The latter was an experiment, and Pullman was doing
everything possible to get the railroads to take hold of it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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