"Abe" Lincoln's Anecdotes and Stories: A Collection of the Best Stories Told by Lincoln Which Made Him Famous as America's Best Story Teller
History
"Abe" Lincoln's Anecdotes and Stories: A Collection of the Best Stories Told by Lincoln Which Made Him Famous as America's Best Story Teller
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
"I feel," said Mr. Lincoln, "a good deal as the old member of the
Methodist Church did when he lost his wife at the camp meeting, and
went up to an old elder of the church and asked him if he could
tell him whereabouts in h--l his wife was. In fact, I am in a worse
fix than my Methodist friend, for if it were only a wife that were
missing, mine would be sure to bob up somewhere."
The clerk at the hotel told Mr. Lincoln that he would probably find
his missing satchel in the baggage-room. Arriving there, Mr. Lincoln
saw a satchel which he thought was his, and it was passed out to him.
His key fitted the lock, but alas! when it was opened the satchel
contained only a soiled shirt, some paper collars, a pack of cards and
a bottle of whisky. A few minutes later the satchel containing the
inaugural address was found among the pile of baggage.
The recovery of the address also reminded Mr. Lincoln of a story,
which is thus narrated by Ward Lamon in his "Recollections of Abraham
Lincoln":
The loss of the address and the search for it was the subject of
a great deal of amusement. Mr. Lincoln said many funny things in
connection with the incident. One of them was that he knew a fellow
once who had saved up fifteen hundred dollars, and had placed it in a
private banking establishment. The bank soon failed, and he afterward
received ten per cent of his investment. He then took his one hundred
and fifty dollars and deposited it in a savings bank, where he was
sure it would be safe. In a short time this bank also failed, and he
received at the final settlement ten per cent on the amount deposited.
When the fifteen dollars was paid over to him, he held it in his hand
and looked at it thoughtfully; then he said, "Now, darn you, I have
got you reduced to a portable shape, so I'll put you in my pocket."
Suiting the action to the word, Mr. Lincoln took his address from the
bag and carefully placed it in the inside pocket of his vest, but held
on to the satchel with as much interest as if it still contained his
"certificate of moral character."
=THE CASE OF BETSY ANN DOUGHERTY=
Many requests and petitions made to Mr. Lincoln when he was President
were ludicrous and trifling, but he always entered into them with that
humor-loving spirit that was such a relief from the grave duties of
his great office.
Once a party of Southerners called on him in behalf of one Betsy Ann
Dougherty. The spokesman, who was an ex-governor, said:
"Mr. President, Betsy Ann Dougherty is a good woman. She lived in my
county and did my washing for a long time. Her husband went off and
joined the rebel army, and I wish you would give her a protection
paper." The solemnity of this appeal struck Mr. Lincoln as uncommonly
ridiculous.
The two men looked at each other--the Governor desperately in earnest,
and the President masking his humor behind the gravest exterior. At
last Mr. Lincoln asked, with inimitable gravity, "Was Betsy Ann a good
washerwoman?" "Oh, yes, sir, she was, indeed."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
"Abe" Lincoln's Anecdotes and Stories: A Collection of the Best Stories Told by Lincoln Which Made Him Famous as America's Best Story Teller — John Shaqi
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