England -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; Spiritualism -- Fiction
The sense of wooden unreality soon began to close in again on Archie,
with that utter absence of feeling which was so far more terrible than
any feeling could be, that soulless insensitiveness as of a live
consciousness that knew it was dead, and he rose from the table after
Helena had delivered him from the consequence of some outrageous
declaration, and went across to a side-table where were placed syphons
and spirits. But now, instead of pouring himself out a glass of
soda-water, he half filled his tumbler with whisky, and but added a
cream of bubble on the top of it. Immediately almost his sense of touch
with life returned; there stole back into himself and the figures of
Colonel Vautier and Jessie the perception of their several identities,
and into Helena the love with which he had endowed her. But that, and
all that it implied, was better than feeling nothing at all. He knew,
too, that when Jessie spoke to him, or looked at him, her voice and her
eyes held for him a supreme and infinite sympathy. He could not reach
it, but he knew it was there. Perhaps when he got used to those new
conditions of nightmare existence, he could make it accessible, get into
touch with it. At present he scarcely wanted it; he wanted nothing so
long as this perception of life still ran in his brain, except Helena.
He thought that she rather pitied him too, but it was not her pity he
wanted, for it was she who had brought her pity on himself.
They played two or three rubbers; Jessie's miserly greed was assuaged by
precisely the sum that Archie had won from Helena, and Colonel Vautier,
after seeing him out, went back to his study to indulge himself in the
cigar which was not permitted in the drawing-room, and the two sisters
were left there. Helena's brain had long been busy, beneath the habitual
jests of their game, over her future relations with Jessie, and she had
come to the conclusion that the sooner they talked the matter out the
better. She found that it affected her comfort to be practically not on
speaking terms with her sister, and, since she had no shrinking from
what might be a painful interview for others, she had made up her mind
to ascertain exactly how Jessie meant to behave to her in the few weeks
for which they would be in close daily and hourly contact, for Lord
Harlow had expressed his mind very clearly about an early date for their
wedding, and Helena entirely agreed with him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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