"I say," said Grim, "I propose myself stage manager. I'm the only fellow who knows a ha'porth about it." "A ha'porth is an awful lot; besides, a chairman can't propose himself," said Cherry, revengefully. "I second the chairman's proposal," said Wilson, backing up his chum. "Carried, _nem. con_." "No, I'm hanged if it was!" said Cherry. "You're a fraud, Grimmy." "All right now, you chaps, the meeting is over. Wilson and I will go up to Acton, and see what he'll do for us, and then we'll rough out a swagger programme." CHAPTER IX THE END OF TERM The two worthies, Grim and Wilson, after seeing Acton, began to get out their programme. Here it is:-- BIFFEN'S JUNIORS' CONCERT. _Cock House, December, 1898._ (1) Epilogue. B.A.M. CHERRY. (2) Poem on the subject of Cock House. B. SHARPE. (3) Bar Act. (4) First Round Junior Boxing Competition. PRINCE RUNJIT MEHTAH and RAM SINGH. (5) SONG. "My First Cigar." R.E. THURSTON. (6) PIANOFORTE SOLO. "Oh! listen to the band." O. BROWN. (7) Second Round Boxing. (8) SONG. "Jim." J. ACTON, ESQ. (9) Third and Concluding Rounds Boxing. (10) SONG. "Well, suppose you did?" R.E. THURSTON. GOD SAVE THE QUEEN. ACCOMPANIST O.E. BROWN. _Trinity College (by Examination)._ STAGE MANAGER W.E. GRIM. N.B.--The Manager begs to state that there will be no Latin or classical allusions throughout the evening. No waits. No charge for programmes. No antediluvian jokes. This was printed on paper blushing pink--Biffen's colours--and Grim and Wilson, when they got the advance proof last thing on Saturday night, almost embraced in their jubilation. There was such a swagger look about the "N.B." Meanwhile B.A.M. Cherry had consulted his dictionary, and therein found that an "epilogue" was defined as "a concluding speech in an oration or play." He broke into a cold sweat of horror. That was an epilogue, then! Where could he find one? What would be the good of one if he did find it? And supposing he had one and could recite it, it was at the wrong end of the programme--the programme which had already been printed in such hot haste? It was too late to tell Grim, who would have instantly summoned all the strength of Biffen's to scrag him. The wretched Cherry shuddered at his awful plight. Nothing could he do or dare he do. In desperation he determined to fall ill on the concert night. B.A.M. Cherry hadn't the heroic soul, and when Grim asked him cheerfully how the epilogue was going on, he said "spiffing," in the tone of a martyr at the stake.