By referring to a printed List he ascertained that he was a member of the Committee on Manual Training for the Alaska Indians. In his Boarding House he became acquainted with Department Clerks who were well advanced in the technology of Base Ball. After a few weeks, he was on chatting Terms with a Young Lady in charge of a Cigar and News Counter. As soon as the Paper was delivered every morning he could find out what had happened in Congress the day before. If confused by the Cares of State, he sought diversion by taking a Visitor from Home to see the Washington Monument. After three months, he met a National Committeeman with a Pull who promised to secure him an introduction to the Speaker so that he could maneuver around and get something into the Record before his time was up. In the meantime, he is heard to advantage on every Roll Call, and the Traducers back in the District have not been able to lay a finger on anything Crooked. MORAL: There is always Room and Board at the Top. THE NEW FABLE OF THE AERIAL PERFORMER, THE BUZZING BLONDINE AND THE DAUGHTER OF MR. JACKSON Once upon a time a Lad with Cinnamon Hair and wide blue Eyes lived in a half-portion Town. He had received more than 2000 Tickets for answering "Here" at the M. E. Sunday School. His kinfolk hoped that some day he would be President of the Town Board. Shortly after he learned to roll a safe game of Pool, his Governor demised. Robert, such being the full front name of the sole Heir, found that he could not spread his Pinions in the narrow Streets of the lichen-covered Hamlet. So he blew. He went to find an Avenue that would accommodate seven Zeppelin Air-Ships moving abreast at one time. He closed out the Dry Goods Emporium with the Shirt-Waists and the shameless Hosiery in the Windows. An Apartment Building, with Packages delivered at the rear, soon began to flaunt itself on the site of the old Manse. With all the currency corraled by the late Store-Keeper padded into his Norfolk Jacket, the gallus Offspring hurried to the Metrop to pick the Primroses. In a short time he was out at the Track every day, barking at the Goats as they hove into the Stretch. The pencil-borrowing Touts and the Wine Pushers began to call him Bob, which proved that he was a Man about Town. When the final Kiflukus was put on the Ponies, he assembled the residue of his Bundle and began to work steady as a Guesser in a Broker's Office. His job was to show at 10 G.M. with a big Reina Victoria at one extreme corner of his Face and pretend to know what was coming off when the Boy put the funny marks on the Blackboard. Ever and anon he would buy 1000 Shares of something, as if Negotiating for a Bread-Ticket. As a rule, the tall-grass Plunger with a wad of new Kale has about the same percentage in his favor as that enjoyed by a Shoat out at the well-known Establishment of Armour & Co.