'Oh, mother! you little think that I saw you, only a few days
ago, from the stile by the cottage which overlooks your house:
you were walking with a lady, and my child was with me
(my Editha, for I have called her after you.) You seemed,
methought, even cheerful, and I was so selfish that I felt
shocked to think I was so entirely forgotten by you; for I was
sure that if you thought of me you could not be cheerful. But
your companion left you; and then you looked so very sad, that
I was wretched from the idea that you were then thinking too
much of me, and I wished you to resume your cheerfulness again.
'_I_ was not cheerful, and Editha by her artless prattle
wounded me to the very soul.--She wished, she said, to live in
that sweet house, and asked why she should not live there? _I
could_ have told her why, but dared not do it; but I assured
her, and do not for mercy's sake prove that assurance false!
that she _should_ live there _one day_.
'"But when--when?" she asked.
'"When I am in my grave,"' replied I: and, poor innocent!
throwing herself into my arms with playful fondness, she begged
me to go to my grave directly. I feel but too sensibly that her
desire will soon be accomplished.
'But must I die unblest by you? True, I am watched by the
kindest of human beings! but then she is not my mother--that
mother, who, with the joys of my childhood and my home, is so
continually recurring to my memory. Oh! I forget all your
unkindness, my mother, and remember only your affection. How I
should like to feel your hand supporting my head, and see you
perform the little offices which sickness requires!--And must
I never, never see you more? Yes! you will come, I am sure you
will: but come, come quickly, or I shall die without your
blessing.
'I have had a fainting fit--but I am recovered, and can address
you again.--Oh! teach my Editha to be humble, teach her to be
slow to call the experience of ages contemptible prejudices;
teach her no opinions that can destroy her sympathies with
general society, and make her an alien to the hearts of those
amongst whom she lives.
'Be above all things careful that she wanders not in the night
of scepticism. But for the support of religion, what, amidst my
various sorrows, what would have become of _me_?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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