Alice in Blunderland: An Iridescent Dream — John Shaqi
Alice in Blunderland: An Iridescent DreamBangs, John Kendrick
Science
Alice in Blunderland: An Iridescent Dream
Bangs, John Kendrick
Fantasy literature; Municipal ownership -- Fiction
"Good-bye, Alice," said the White Knight sympathetically; and then
thrusting a paper in her hand, he leaned forward and whispered into the
little girl's ear, "If you get into trouble, use this."
"Thank you," said Alice. "What is it?"
"It's a temporary injunction issued by the Chief Justice restraining
anybody from interfering with you," said the White Knight. "You may need
it."
And the kindly old knight ran madly off up the street after the Mayor
and the March Hare, and shortly disappeared around the corner.
"Now, my little dear," said the Duchess, "we'll take you home."
Seizing Alice by the hand the Duchess led the little traveller into the
Municipal Nursery. Entering the elevator, they went up and up and up and
up until Alice thought they would never stop. Finally on the 117th floor
the elevator stopped. Alice and the Duchess alighted and entered a funny
little flat, singularly enough labelled with Alice's own name.
"This is it," said the Duchess. "There is your bedroom, here is your
parlour, and that is the bath-room. The apartment has running
soda-water, hot and cold; you will find a refrigerator stocked with
peanut brittle, molasses candy, and sugared fruits in the pantry. Your
reading will consist of Lucy the Lace Vendor, or How the Laundress
Became a Lady; the works of Marie Corelli; Factory Fanny, the Forger's
Daughter, and any other unwholesome book you may want from the House of
Correction Library. Playtime will begin at seven every morning and you
will be compelled to dress and undress dolls until one, when your
caramel will be given to you, after which you will skip the rope and
read fairy stories until six. You must drink five glasses of soda-water
every day and will not be allowed to go to bed before eleven o'clock at
night. Hurry now, and get your hair mussed and your hands dirty for
dinner. The first course of whipped cream and roasted chestnuts will be
served promptly at six-thirty."
"But," cried Alice, "I don't want to stay here--I want to go home."
"You are home," said the Duchess. "This is the Municipal Home of the
Children of Blunderland."
"But I want my father and mother," whimpered Alice.
"The City is your father, my child, and I am officially your mother,"
said the Duchess.
"You are not!" cried Alice. "You are trying to kidnap me!--I'll--I'll
call the police."
"The police can't arrest a city, my dear child, and as for me, as the
Commissioner of Maternity I am immune from arrest," laughed the Duchess.
"Well, I just won't stay, that's all," cried Alice, stamping her foot
angrily. "I don't want a city for a father, and I shan't have an official
mother in place of a real one."
[Illustration: "SEIZING HER BY THE ARM"]
The child ran toward the door, but the Duchess was too quick for her,
seizing her by the arm.
"Let me go!" shrieked Alice.
"Never," snapped the Duchess.
And then the little girl thought of the piece of paper the White Knight
had given her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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