Come, we shall have some fun now! I'm glad you've begun asking riddles--I believe I can guess that. MARCH HARE So you mean that you think you can find out the answer to it? [Illustration: HATTER: Your hair wants cutting.] ALICE Exactly so. MARCH HARE Then you should say what you mean. ALICE I do; at least--at least I mean what I say--that's the same thing, you know. HATTER Not the same thing a bit! Why, you might just as well say that "I see what I eat" is the same thing as, "I eat what I see!" MARCH HARE You might just as well say that "I like what I get," is the same thing as "I get what I like." DORMOUSE You might just as well say that "I breathe when I sleep" is the same thing as "I sleep when I breathe." HATTER It _is_ the same thing with you. [_Takes out his watch, looks at it uneasily, shakes it, holds it to his ear._] What day of the month is it? ALICE The fourth. HATTER Two days wrong. I told you butter wouldn't suit the works! MARCH HARE It was the _best_ butter. HATTER Yes, but some crumbs must have got in as well; you shouldn't have put it in with the bread-knife-- MARCH HARE [_Takes the watch, looks at it gloomily, dips it into his cup of tea and looks at it again but doesn't know what else to say._] It was the _best_ butter, you know. ALICE What a funny watch! It tells the day of the month, and doesn't tell what o'clock it is. HATTER Why should it? Does _your_ watch tell you what year it is? ALICE Of course not, but that's because it stays the same year for such a long time together. HATTER Which is just the case with _mine_. ALICE I don't quite understand you. What you said had no sort of meaning in it and yet it was certainly English. HATTER [_Pouring some hot tea on the DORMOUSE'S nose._] The Dormouse is asleep again. DORMOUSE Of course, of course, just what I was going to remark myself. HATTER Have you guessed the riddle yet? ALICE No, I give it up, what's the answer? HATTER I haven't the slightest idea. MARCH HARE Nor I. ALICE I think you might do something better with the time, than wasting it in asking riddles that have no answers. HATTER If you knew Time as well as I do, you wouldn't talk about wasting _it_. It's _him_. ALICE I don't know what you mean. HATTER Of course you don't. I dare say you never even spoke to Time. ALICE Perhaps not, but I know I have to beat time when I learn music. HATTER Ah, that accounts for it. He won't stand beating. Now, if you only kept on good terms with him, he'd do almost anything you liked with the clock. For instance, suppose it were nine o'clock in the morning, just time to begin lessons. You'd only have to whisper a hint to Time, and round goes the clock in a twinkling! Half past one, time for dinner. MARCH HARE I only wish it was. ALICE That would be grand, certainly, but then--I shouldn't be hungry for it, you know. HATTER