ALL THE PEOPLE By R. A. LAFFERTY Illustrated by GAUGHAN [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from Galaxy Magazine April 1961. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.] Tin Tony Trotz had only one job--to watch out for something a little odd--in a universe that was insane! Anthony Trotz went first to the politician, Mike Delado. "How many people do you know, Mr. Delado?" "Why the question?" "I am wondering just what amount of detail the mind can hold." "To a degree I know many. Ten thousand well, thirty thousand by name, probably a hundred thousand by face and to shake hands with." "And what is the limit?" Anthony inquired. "Possibly I am the limit." The politician smiled frostily. "The only limit is time, speed of cognizance and retention. I am told that the latter lessens with age. I am seventy, and it has not done so with me. Whom I have known I do not forget." "And with special training could one go beyond you?" "I doubt if one could--much. For my own training has been quite special. Nobody has been so entirely with the people as I have. I've taken five memory courses in my time, but the tricks of all of them I had already come to on my own. I am a great believer in the commonality of mankind and of near equal inherent ability. Yet there are some, say the one man in fifty, who in degree if not in kind do exceed their fellows in scope and awareness and vitality. I am that one man in fifty, and knowing people is my specialty." "Could a man who specialized still more--and to the exclusion of other things--know a hundred thousand men well." "It is possible. Dimly." "A quarter of a million?" "I think not. He might learn that many faces and names, but he would not know the men." Anthony went next to the philosopher, Gabriel Mindel. "Mr. Mindel, how many people do you know?" "How know? _Per se?_ _A se?_ Or _In Se_? _Per suam essentiam_, perhaps? Or do you mean _Ab alio_? Or to know as _Hoc aliquid_? There is a fine difference there. Or do you possibly mean to know in _Substantia prima_, or in the sense of comprehensive _noumena_?" "Somewhere between the latter two. How many persons do you know by name, face, and with a degree of intimacy?" "I have learned over the years the names of some of my colleagues, possibly a dozen of them. I am now sound on my wife's name, and I seldom stumble over the names of my offspring--never more than momentarily. But you may have come to the wrong man for--whatever you have come for. I am notoriously poor at names, faces, and persons. I have even been described (_vox faucibus haesit_) as absent-minded."