Altruism: Its Nature and VarietiesPalmer, George Herbert
Philosophy
Altruism: Its Nature and Varieties
Palmer, George Herbert
Altruism
But friendship differs from love in the degree of intensity of its
emotion and in the extent of the tract of life covered. In these
respects it more nearly resembles liking. We all know how slight a
friendly feeling may be, even when entirely genuine. This is because
of the well-recognized limits of friendship, limits sometimes narrow,
sometimes broad. I take John for my friend on account of his wit, James
for his scholarship, Henry for discussion of art, Charles for theology.
Outside these matters we have little in common. If I try to introduce
these friends to other sides of me, I know that our friendship would be
strained. Love knows no such limits. In it there is no holding back.
There the more we give the more we have. Not that in friendship we set
up such limits by our own volition, as is done in partnership. The
limits are ingrained in the persons, and beyond them we know it is
futile to press. When two natures have certain sides that fit, to the
advantage of each, a friendship springs up. But how embarrassing when
some friend whom we greatly value has limitations which oblige us to
pause and he, not perceiving them, attributes to our adverse will the
failure in full mutual accord! Because of its narrow bounds and because
it is sought for individual gain, friendship is of far wider currency
than love. We make and drop our friendships with comparative ease,
hardly from the first expecting them to be lasting. But a love to which
we contemplated an end, either in extent or duration, would be already
ended. The Greeks justly eulogized friendship as our best security
in an uncertain world. And, obviously, he is imprudent who does not
surround himself with a protecting band of friends.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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