Et quom te[19] gravidam et quom te pulchre plenam aspicio, gaudeo. Ah, it is splendid to see your condition, dear, and to see you getting on so finely. _Alc._ Obsecro ecastor, quid tu me deridiculi gratia sic salutas atque appellas, quasi dudum non videris quasique nunc primum recipias te domum huc ex hostibus?[20] (684) Good gracious! Why are you making fun of me with all these greetings and salutations, as if you had not seen me a little while ago and were just this moment back from the war? _Amph._ Immo equidem te nisi nunc hodie nusquam vidi gentium. (686) (_surprised_) Why, why, but I have not seen you--no, nowhere at all except this very instant. _Alc._ Cur negas? What makes you deny it? _Amph._ Quia vera didici dicere. Because I have learned to tell the truth. _Alc._ Haud aequom facit qui quod didicit id dediscit. an periclitamini quid animi habeam? sed quid huc vos revortimini tam cito? an te auspicium commoratum est an tempestas continet 690 qui non abiisti ad legiones, ita uti dudum dixeras? It is not a good plan to learn a thing and then unlearn it. Or is this a test of my feelings? But why are you returning so quickly? Were you delayed by bad omens, or is it the weather detains you, that you have not gone away to the army, as you spoke of doing a little while ago? _Amph._ Dudum? quam dudum istuc factum est? A little while ago? How little a while ago was that? _Alc._ Temptas. iam dudum, modo. Tease! Oh, quite a little while ago--just now. _Amph._ Qui istuc potis est fieri, quaeso, ut dicis: iam dudum, modo? For heaven’s sake, how can those statements agree--“quite a little while ago” and “just now”? _Alc._ Quid enim censes? te ut deludam contra lusorem meum, qui nunc primum te advenisse dicas, modo qui hinc abieris. Well, how do you suppose? I am merely trying to make game of you for a change, after your making game of me by saying this is your first appearance here, when you just now left us. _Amph._ Haec quidem deliramenta loquitur. (_to Sosia_) Upon my soul, she is raving! _Sos._ Paulisper mane, dum edormiscat unum somnum. Wait a while till she has slept out just one sleep. _Amph._ Quaene vigilans somniat? What, awake and dreaming? _Alc._ Equidem ecastor vigilo, et vigilans id quod factum est fabulor. nam dudum ante lucem et istunc et te vidi. (_indignantly_) To be sure I am awake, and awake as I relate what happened. Why, just a little while ago before dawn I saw that man and you, both. _Amph._ Quo in loco? Where was this? _Alc._ Hic in aedibus ubi tu habitas. Here in your very own house, sir. _Amph._ Numquam factum est. Impossible! _Sos._