After he had his books arranged he sat down in an armchair beside a
front window, and felt rather happy and at home. He reproached himself
for his content when he read the morning paper, and considered the
horrors going on in Europe. Why should he, an able-bodied man, sit
securely in a room and gaze out at a peaceful village street? he asked
himself as he had scores of times before. Then the imperial individual,
which obtrudes even when conscience cries out against it, occupied his
mind. Pretty Fanny Dodge in her blue linen was passing. She never once
glanced at the parsonage. Forgetting his own scruples and resolves, he
thought unreasonably that she might at least glance up, if she had the
day before at all in her mind. Suddenly the unwelcome reflection that
he might not be as desirable as he had thought himself came over him.
He got up, put on his hat, and walked rapidly in the direction of the
old Bolton house. Satisfying his curiosity might serve as a palliative
to his sudden depression with regard to his love affair. It is very
much more comfortable to consider oneself a cad, and acknowledge to
oneself love for a girl, and be sure of her unfortunate love for you,
than to consider oneself the dupe of the girl. Fanny had a keen sense
of humor. Suppose she had been making fun of him. Suppose she had her
own aspirations in other quarters. He walked on until he reached the
old Bolton house. The door stood open, askew upon rusty hinges. Wesley
Elliot entered and glanced about him with growing curiosity. The room
was obviously a kitchen, one side being occupied by a huge brick
chimney inclosing a built-in range half devoured with rust; wall
cupboards, a sink and a decrepit table showed gray and ugly in the
greenish light of two tall windows, completely blocked on the outside
with over-grown shrubs. An indescribable odor of decaying plaster,
chimney-soot and mildew hung in the heavy air.
A door to the right, also half open, led the investigator further. Here
the floor shook ominously under foot, suggesting rotten beams and
unsteady sills. The minister walked cautiously, noting in passing a
portrait defaced with cobwebs over the marble mantelpiece and the great
circular window opening upon an expanse of tangled grass and weeds,
through which the sun streamed hot and yellow. Voices came from an
adjoining room; he could hear Deacon Whittle’s nasal tones upraised in
fervid assertion.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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