English fiction -- 20th century; Sea stories, English; War stories, English; World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
She obtruded upon his thoughts as sunlight enters a room past
curtains waving in the breeze, while with the dour perversity of his
queer nature he tried to shut her out.
There were women about whom no one could cherish any illusions; with
these Graeme Jakes was half contemptuously, half pityingly at ease.
But in Claire Mayne he saw someone who approached so exquisitely to
his ideal of womanhood that he dreaded disillusionment. Thus and
thus must his goddess be fashioned, and the first word or act of hers
that betrayed feet of clay would have filled him with bitterness and
disappointment.
However, as time went on, one after another he drew forth timidly
from the secret hiding-place of his soul some fresh idealism; draping
them about his conception of her, until the real and the imaginary
woman blended into that dear, everlastingly inaccessible unreality
which is all mankind's first love.
Transports of this nature are usually apparent enough in the
demeanour; but Graeme Jakes's oriental imperturbability of
countenance gave not the slightest betrayal of the turmoil in his
thoughts.
Claire Mayne herself remained serenely unconscious of anything in the
air more vibrant than a grave friendliness and a shy, half-reluctant
admiration. She would not have been the normal, healthy young woman
she was had she not thought about him a good deal. When the children
were in bed and the stars made visible the dark outline of the hills
opposite, she sat by her open window, with the tiny room behind her
in darkness; there, chin in hand, she tried to assign him to some
known category amongst her limited male acquaintances, and found the
task difficult.
Since girlhood her pet character in fiction had been Alan Breck; not
for his swashbuckling gallantry, nor the efficient way with him in
sword play, but because, as she herself put it, "he wanted looking
after so dreadfully."
Graeme Jakes, in some subtle way that eluded analysis, appealed to
her in much the same manner. His clothes lacked buttons at times and
his hair was generally dreadfully untidy. She would like, she
thought, to brush his hair for him ... in a brisk, sisterly fashion.
The tranquillity of her meditations would have been sorely disturbed
could she have seen the object of her thoughts. Half a mile away,
from a vantage point amid the dewy bracken, stood her devout lover,
watching with all a lover's faculty for self-hypnotism a light
burning behind a blind in one of the upper windows of the farm.
Fondly he watched its orange glow through the darkness until it was
abruptly extinguished, and returned home in a mood of exalted
melancholy. Judge though how greater the melancholy had he realised
the blind screened no other than the conjugal chamber of the farmer
and his wife....
The days went by thus to merge into weeks, and the children's visit
was fast drawing to a close. Graeme, too, had received orders to
attend at the Admiralty for medical survey. The halcyon days were
numbered.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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