it must be more provoking to him, than ’tis to a _Lion_ to be pull’d by the _Beard_. And if, when to crown all his Labours, he has discover’d a Water so near a kin to the famous one, that cou’d be kept in nothing but the hoof of an Ass, that it was never found but in the _Scull_ of the same _Animal_; a Water that makes no more of melting a _World_, than a _Dutchman_ does of a _Ferkin_ of _Butter_; and when he has written a Book of Discoveries, and Wonders thereupon, if (I say) the Impertinent Scriblers of the Age, will still be demanding _Proofs_ and writing _Answers_, he has reason to throw down his _Pen_ in a rage, and pronounce the world, that cou’d give him such an interruption, unworthy to be blest with his future labours, and breath eternal Defiance to it, as irreconcilable, as the quarrel of the Sons of _Oedipus_. To which prudent Resolution, let us leave him till he can recover his Temper. These Instances, _Madam_, will (I hope) suffice to shew that Men are themselves altogether as impertinent, as they maliciously misrepresent us. It is not for want of plenty of others that I content my self with these; but I am not willing to trouble you with any of an inferiour Character. These are all impertinents of _Mark_ and _Note_, and have severally the good fortune to find crowds of _Fools_ of their own Sex to applaud and admire them. _Impertinence_ is a failing, that has its _Root_ in _Nature_; but is not worth Laughing at, till it has receiv’d the finishing strokes of Art. A Man through natural defects may do abundance of incoherent, foolish Actions, yet deserve _Compassion_ and _Advice_ rather than _Derision_. But to see Men spending their Fortunes, as well as Lives, in a course of _Regular Folly_, and with an industrious, as well as expensive Idleness running through tedious _Systems_ of impertinence, wou’d have split the sides of _Heraclitus_, had it been his fortune to have been a Spectator. ’Tis very easie to decide which of these _Impertinents_ is the most signal; the _Vertuoso_ is manifestly without a Competitour. For our Follies are not to be measur’d by the degree of _Ignorance_, that appears in ’em, but by the Study, Labour and Expence they cost us to finish and compleat ’em. So that the more Regularity and Artifice there appears in any of our Extravagancies, the greater is the folly of ’em. Upon this Score it is, that the last mention’d deservedly claim the preference to all others; they have improv’d so well their Amusements into an Art, that the _Credulous_ and _Ignorant_ are induc’d to believe there is some secret Vertue, some hidden Mystery in those darling toys of theirs; when all their Bustling amounts to no more than a learned _Impertinence_, (for so they abuse the Term) and all they teach Men is, but a specious expensive method of throwing away both Time and Money.