An essay on the government of children, under three general heads, viz. health, manners, and educationNelson, James
History
An essay on the government of children, under three general heads, viz. health, manners, and education
Nelson, James
Child rearing -- England -- History -- 18th century
Children, while young, may be compared to Machines; which are, or
should be, put in Motion, or stopped, at the Will of others: but here
it must be confessed, that ’till they are able to conduct themselves,
they stand in need of good Conductors. For Example, Children have the
Gift of Speech; but to how perverse a Purpose, unless regulated? Their
Wit, their Cunning, or their Knowledge, often serve but to mislead them;
serve but to strengthen the natural Corruption of their Will. What is
more common than for a Child to make no Answer when ask’d a Question? Or
what more common than for another, or perhaps the same in a different
Mood, to tire a whole Company with incessant Prating? Now nothing can
regulate these but the Judgment of Parents; the whole Machine, that is,
the Words and Actions of Children, are to be under their Guidance alone:
to this End, they must set out with a Resolution to conquer; and never
quit the Field of Argument ’till they have. When a Question is ask’d a
Child, no Matter by whom, whether by the Parents, a Visitor, a Servant,
or a Beggar, it must never be suffered to go unanswered; all the Rules of
Breeding and Civility demand it; and nothing can excuse a Non-compliance:
so, on the other hand, when a Child has a fluent, voluble Tongue, and is
disposed to talk out of Time and Place, and to say perhaps many improper
or unbecoming things, it must certainly be restrained. But tho’ I urge
this, it is not merely because Children should speak or be silent; do
a thing, or let it alone, when bid; for however right or pleasing all
this is, it is far from being the only Motive; no, it is the Influence
the opposite Behaviour will have on Children’s future Lives that must
be the Point in View. A Child accustomed not to answer when spoke to,
will probably contract a morose, dogged, or, at least, an uncivil Habit;
another suffered to out-talk every body in the House, will be in Danger
of becoming an impertinent, if not an empty Prater; and if a third is
never refused the thing it asks for, it will be but ill prepared to
bear Disappointments. Parents I know are apt to think nothing of these
Irregularities; but it is Inattention to the first Errors, which lays
the Foundation of Vices for Life. What is it distinguishes Mankind
from all created Nature, but that superior Power, Reason? Yet what is
it makes this noble Faculty, this boasted Power, so often useless, nay
destructive, but the Corruption of the Will? Will is a distinct Power in
the Soul; but as it is naturally corrupt, if Parents neglect an early
Restraint of it in their Children, it is great odds that their Reason
will never be able to conquer it: nay there are many who never attempt
the subjecting it; who banish every thing which does not favour their
Inclinations, however irregular; and even among those who struggle for
Reason to gain the Ascendant, the Combat is often unequal. Hence appears
the Necessity of attending to the earliest Words and Actions of Children;
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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