Capital punishment -- Fiction; Chicago (Ill.) -- Fiction; Criminals -- Fiction; Prisoners -- Fiction
“Well, after the kid was about a year old we began to have trouble. She
was always complainin’ that I didn’t bring home enough money. She said I
went ‘round too much nights and that I drank too much beer and chewed
too much tobacco and smoked too much, and she complained ‘most all the
time, and then I got mad and we had a row. I don’t mean to blame her,
‘specially after what happened, and since I’ve been here so long doin’
nothin’ but countin’ the days and waitin’ for my lawyer to come, I’ve
had time to think of ever’thing a good deal more than I ever did before.
And I don’t say she was to blame. I s’pose it was hard for her, too. Of
course, the rooms was small and they was awful hot in the summer and
cold in the winter, and then the collectors was always comin’ ‘round,
and I used to be tired when I got home, and I was so blue that I said
things without really knowin’ that I said ‘em. Ain’t you done that when
somebody was talkin’ to you and your mind was on somethin’ else, kind of
answered ‘em back without knowin’ what they said or what you said? I
presume I was cross a good many times and mebbe it was as hard for her
as ‘twas for me. Of course, I used to wish I’d never got married and
that I was boardin’ back there to the restaurant when I didn’t have all
the debts; and I s’pose she’d been better off back there too, waitin’ on
the table; anyhow she always looked better in them days than she did
after we was married, so I guess she must have got more money at the
restaurant than I gave her. But after the boy was born I never really
wished we wa’n’t married, for I always thought of him and knew he never
would have been born if we hadn’t got married; but of course, that
didn’t keep us from fightin’. I don’t mean that we fought all the time.
Sometimes when I got home she was as nice as she could be, and had
supper all ready, and we’d read the newspaper and talk and have a real
good time; but then, again somethin’ would happen to put us out and we’d
fight. I can’t say that she always begun it. I guess I begun it a good
many times. I found fault because the bills was too big and the way
things was cooked, and the way she looked, and, of course, if I said
anything she got mad and answered back. I’ve thought a lot about our
fights and that awful one we had last, and I don’t believe one of ‘em
would have happened if it hadn’t been for the money. Of course, I s’pose
other people would make some other excuses for their fights and that no
one would be to blame if you would let ‘em tell it themselves, but I’m
‘most sure that if I’d only been gettin’ money enough to keep a hired
girl and live in a good place, and get good clothes and dress her and
the boy the way they ought to have been, and not get in debt, we
wouldn’t have fought.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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