Interpersonal relations -- Fiction; Spiritualism -- Fiction; United States -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
When he returned everything was going on as usual at the house, yet
nothing was the same to him, nor could it ever be again. He did not
speak of Doring to Miss Hill, but she herself went back to the subject,
chiding him for going away.
“I saw Mr. Doring,” he answered, curtly, “and didn’t like him. You may
think my opinion of him is colored by jealousy, but I am sure it is
not. I hope you will never marry him.”
“Well, I have not yet decided to marry him,” she said.
“If you have not given him up entirely it will end that way at last.
You are merely temporizing with the situation, and it will master you.”
“Probably,” she said, wearily, and then they spoke of it no more.
* * * * *
Not long after, Westfield went away. When he was gone she felt a sense
of desolation new in her experience. He was so good a comrade. Why
had he been so foolish as to leave? Could men and women never be good
comrades--only lovers, or nothing?
* * * * *
The days went on apparently as though there had never been a Westfield,
though the other members of the household thought Miss Hill was not
quite like herself, that perhaps she was fonder of Westfield than she
had believed herself to be, and regretted him. Brooks was strongly
inclined to this opinion, though when he talked with his wife about it
he drubbed Westfield soundly. “Blast the fool,” he said, “what could
she do but let him go, even if she were fond of him? What woman not
an idiot would think of marrying Westfield, who is simply a charming
failure, a penniless, indifferent, intellectual tramp?”
In truth they were half right in their surmises. The old content had
vanished. She missed the intellectual sympathy of Westfield, and Doring
kept her restless with his importunings. She read his letters by the
light of her own integrity, and therefore saw not the rank selfishness
of the writer, who was vain and dull, but persistent to a degree that
made him formidable as a wooer. He had recourse to all the selfish
arguments of little souls. He said he was so perturbed in mind that he
could not get on in anything, consequently in danger of financial ruin,
and hinted darkly at suicide. A crisis had come to her. Forces within
and without were wrestling over her destiny. Unseen hands were pushing
her. At times she determined to marry Doring at all risks, and thus
settle the problem, but the decision did not bring peace, as decisions
should. A sickening sense of imminent disaster followed, and she was at
sea again.
Weeks rolled into months, and the chaotic misery of her mind was making
her look worn and ill. A day came at last in which the genius of her
fate cast the die.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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