Bildungsromans; Deception -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Mothers and daughters -- Fiction; Women authors -- Fiction
Her eyes were dark and had interesting twinkles in them that children
loved; her hair was long and dark and very heavy, dressed in two wide
braids that were wound round and round her lovely head in smooth coils,
fitting close like a cap, but when it was unbraided and brushed out,
it fell far below her knees and was like a garment folding her about.
How I adored that hair and longed to have hair just like it! How I even
used in secret to tie an old brown veil about my head and let it fall
down my back, and try to see how it would feel to have hair like that.
She had delicate features and a wonderful smile. Nobody else in the
world looked just as lovely as did she. But once I found a picture of
Longfellow's Evangeline in a photograph album, in exquisite classic
profile, and thought it was her likeness. She was like that—if you have
that old faded photograph somewhere in an old album with quaint clasps.
She was wonderful!
And she was young, gracious, and very good to be with.
This radiant creature was known to me by the name of "Auntie Belle,"
though my mother and my grandmother, called her "Isabella!" Just like
that! Even sharply sometimes when they disagreed with her—"Isabella!" I
wondered that they dared. I sometimes resented it.
Later I found that other people had still other names for her. To the
congregation of which her husband was pastor she was known as "Mrs.
Alden." It seemed to me too grownup a name for her and made her appear
more stately and sedate than she really was. I remember resenting it
that these strange people should seem to have rights in her. She was
mine. What were they?
But when a little later my world grew larger, and knowledge increased,
I found that this precious aunt of mine did not belong entirely to us
as I had supposed. She had another world in which she moved and had
her being when she went from us from time to time; or when at certain
hours in the day she shut herself within a room that was sacredly known
as a "study," and wrote for a long time, while we all tried to keep
still; and in this other world of hers she was known as "Pansy." It was
a world that loved and honored her, a world that gave her homage and
flowers, and wrote her letters by the hundreds each week.
It was not long, too, before I had learned to preen myself like a young
peacock because I "belonged" to her, and I am afraid I felt a superior
pity and contempt for the thousands of other children who read her
paper called "The Pansy" which she edited, but who did not "belong"
to her. They could only write letters to her, while I could often be
with her every day, sometimes for weeks, and could talk with her all I
pleased.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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