Perico de Ayala, the buffoon of the Marquis de Villena, came to see Don Frances, the buffoon of Charles V. when he lay on his death bed. Perico seeing him in so bad a way, said, Brother Don Frances, I request you, by the great friendship which always was between us, that when you go to heaven (which I believe must be very soon, since you lived so pious a life), you will beseech God to have mercy on my soul. Frances answered, _Tie a thread on this finger, that I may not forget it_. These were his last words; and he instantly expired. * * * * * The servants of a Spanish lord said, in his presence, that Don Diego Deza, archbishop of Seville, was very liberal to his domestics. The lord answered, So he may, for he has his wealth but for his life. A page replied, _And for how many lives has your lordship yours?_ * * * * * Some thieves trying one night to break into a shop, in which two servant men lay; one of them called to the robbers. _Come back when we are asleep._ * * * * * A rich man sent to call a physician for a slight disorder he had suffered the preceding night. The physician felt his pulse, and said, Sir, do you eat well? Yes, said the patient. Do you sleep well? I do. _Then_, said the physician, _I shall give you something to take away all that_. * * * * * A labourer intending to bind his son apprentice to a butcher, asked a gentleman of the village, his friend, to whom he should put him. The answer was, _You had best bind him to the physician, for he is the best butcher I know_. * * * * * A physician went to visit a young lady, daughter of a nobleman. Desiring her arm, to feel her pulse, the damsel, from pride, covered the place with the sleeve of her shift. The physician also drew down his coat sleeve, and applying it, said, _A linen pulse must have a woollen physician_. * * * * * A bad painter, who had never produced any thing worth, went to another place, and commenced physician. A person who knew him, meeting him there, asked the reason of this change. _Because_ said he, _if I now commit faults, the earth covers them_. To a student of a college was brought a large dish of soup, and only one pea in it. He rose, and began to strip. His companion asking what was the matter, he answered, _I am going to swim after that pea_. * * * * * The effects of a merchant, who was greatly in debt, being on sale, one bought a pillow, saying, _That it must be good to sleep on, since he could sleep on it, who owed so much_. * * * * * The same merchant being asked, how he could sleep with such debts upon him? said, _The wonder is, how my creditors could sleep_. * * * * *