English fiction -- 20th century; Husband and wife -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Short stories, English
Two hours had gone labouring, the second of which Captain Festival had
spent perambulating Lincoln’s Inn Fields and consulting his watch. His
nervous demeanour was such that by ten o’clock he was being observed by
the police. On the stroke of the hour, however, the suspect
disappeared. . . .
As the door closed behind him—
“Forsyth,” gasped Giles, “she’s turned me down.”
“No?”—incredulously.
“It’s a shell-proof fact. And I’ve just tied it up, nailed it down and
sunk it in the bright, blue sea. I warn you, I ought to be removed. I’m
a public danger.” He began to search his pockets with nervous
inefficacy. “Where’s that blinkin’ letter gone?”
“Sit down,” said Forsyth, indicating a chair. “And please begin at the
beginning. I’ve another appointment in——”
“Now, don’t rush me,” said Giles. “I’m all of a doohah, I am. And if you
rush me, I shall burst into tears.” He mopped his brow feverishly.
“About six weeks ago . . .”
The tale came pelting.
The lawyer, who had given a frenzied Katharine an appointment for
half-past ten, began to see daylight.
“And there you are,” concluded Giles violently. “That letter means she’s
attracted to Pat Lafone. I’ll bet it cost her a hell of a lot to write
it, because—well, it’s a pretty thick thing to tell your husband, isn’t
it? And now she’s had _my_ letter, which tells her in so many words to
count me out and go full blast ahead.”
Forsyth fingered his chin.
“What did you write it for?”
“Ask the fowls of the air,” said Giles wearily. “They might be able to
tell you. I can’t. I suppose I had some rotten, weak-kneed idea of
frightening her back into my arms. Of course, it was a hopeless thing to
do. But when you’re desperate you do do hopeless things.”
“Why ‘desperate’?” said Forsyth.
“Because I can’t stand it,” shouted his client. “I’m not a graven image.
For nearly three blinkin’ months I’ve stood and watched all London
swarming about my wife: I’ve smirked and bowed and scraped and pretended
I didn’t care: I’ve sat up and begged, like the rest, for a dance or a
smile: and once a blistering week I’ve met her across our own table and
made imitation back-chat and done the grateful guest. . . . And the last
three times I went there she gave me grocer’s port.” He raised his eyes
to heaven and clenched his teeth. “If ever I get a chance, I’ll break
that butler’s back. I believe that’s half the reason I wrote that
blasted note.”
Here the telephone bell intervened.
“Excuse me,” said Forsyth. “Yes? . . . Very well. Mr. Maple’s out, isn’t
he? . . . Then show them into his room and ask them to wait.”
As he replaced the receiver—
“What the devil am I to do?” said Captain Festival.
“Nothing,” said Forsyth.
“_Nothing?_”
“Nothing.”
“Oh, the man’s mad,” wailed Giles. “I’ve infected him.”
“As you and your wife’s trustee, I say that you can do nothing. You’ve
covenanted not to molest. Your hands are tied. And now. . . .”
He rose to his feet.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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