Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Older women -- Fiction; Single women -- Fiction; Villages -- England -- Fiction
Few of her own generation were alive, and with the younger race she
concerned herself but little. Anne knew that she had a nephew, her
sister’s child. She had occasionally spoken of him as her heir,
generally with the dry comment that she grudged him the money.
“He’s a great gaby,” she often declared, “and his vulgar wife will make
ducks and drakes of my fortune.
“But there, my dear, what does it matter? In the place where I go
there’s neither knowledge nor understanding. It will be all the same to
me.”
* * * * *
Anne left the sick-room, and from force of habit, wandered out into the
garden.
“How lonely! How desolate!” she found herself thinking.
“And I shall be just as lonely, just as desolate when it comes to my
turn.”
She turned her face towards the quiet evening sky, in which, despite
one or two trembling stars, the flush of sunset still lingered, and
again despair fell like a cold hand upon her heart.
All the afternoon she had felt so gay. She had been amused, interested,
almost flattered.
Now the words she had just heard, recurred to her. “Tell them to come.
You are quite old enough to look after them.”
A sudden miserable sensation of shame assailed her, to remember how
young she had felt. In welcoming her visitors, she had not thought of
her age at all. She had accepted them as equals and contemporaries.
The blinding tears which made her stumble on the path already dim with
twilight, caused her to bow her head with the instinct of hiding them
even from herself.
“I’m quite old--quite old,” she repeated with something that was partly
a sob, partly a shiver. “They didn’t make me feel it, because they are
kind, and they have charming manners. But they are young, and life is
all before them. It’s all over for me--and I’ve never had it.”
The bats skimmed noiselessly past her, in the dusk. All the birds had
ceased singing. It was nearly dark, but with a horror of returning to
the house, of being shut within four walls, Anne sat at the foot of the
sundial, and in the darkness her tears fell.
* * * * *
Yet next morning, in the sunshine, when René Dampierre came to ask her
to the “studio,” it seemed not only easy, but natural, to smile, and be
well pleased. When she found herself with her new friends, depressing
thoughts fled like magic.
They were so obviously glad to see her. They interested her so much
with their discussions, their enthusiasm, their talk, fresh and new
to her, of methods, and values and style, in painting, in writing, in
music, in the whole world of art to which hitherto she had travelled
alone; speechless, like a ghost amongst ghosts.
From the outset, Anne saw that René Dampierre was regarded with a
certain admiring respect by his companions. Already he was considered a
great man; already they looked up to him as a leader, an authority.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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