"I heard you walking on the gravel--a very light step which could be
nobody's but yours, and constantly stopping and going on again. I was in
the studio, then I came here and held the door ajar, saying to myself:
'She is still out-of-doors, she can't get in, she will take cold, she is
tired, she is suffering, perhaps she is afraid!' I could not stand it
any longer; indeed, it was my duty. And this must not go on, you know;
whatever people may say or think, I do not propose that you shall kill
yourself; no, I do not!"
Julien was profoundly moved, his voice trembled, and so did his hands as
he placed his mother's cloak over Julie's shoulders; but he did not
struggle against the surprises of passion; he chided rather, like a
father who sees his child in danger. It did not occur to him that he
could be accused of selfish love or of a treacherous exploit. So that he
forgot all considerations of propriety, and there was in his solicitude
a passionate intonation which overpowered Julie. She grasped both his
hands and, carried away herself by an outburst of exalted passion, the
first in her life, the least expected and the most unconquerable, she
exclaimed wildly:
"You love me, you love me, I am sure! Then tell me so, that I may hear
it and know it! You love me--as I want to be loved!"
Julien stifled a cry, lost his head completely and carried Julie into
his studio; but she had led so chaste a life that the alarm of her
modesty inevitably caused her lover's respect, momentarily submerged, to
rise again to the higher regions of his heart. He fell at her feet and
covered the tips of her ice-cold fingers with kisses, imploring her to
have perfect confidence in him.
"Confidence!" he exclaimed, "confidence! I have sworn that I would be
your brother. It is your brother who is here beside you, do not doubt
it, and your confidence will save me. I told you that I adored you; that
is truer than I can possibly tell you, stronger than you can dream, more
terrible than I myself imagined; but I will not cause you to shed a
tear, I would kill myself first! Have no fear; you shall never need to
blush for having ordered me to love you."
Could he have kept his word? He believed that he could, even at the
height of his delirious joy. Julie increased his strength by her own
boldness.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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