As the song ends, their champion returns triumphant from his encounter
with Cleon in the Senate. The Knights receive him with enthusiasm, and
he tells for their gratification the story of his victory, which he
ascribes to the influence of the great powers of Humbug and Knavery,
Impudence and Bluster, whom he had piously invoked at the outset. He had
distracted the attention of the senators from his rival’s harangue by
announcing to them the arrival of a vast shoal of anchovies, of which
every man was eager to secure his share. In vain had Cleon tried to
create a diversion in his own favour by the announcement that a herald
had arrived from Sparta to treat of peace. “Peace, indeed, when
anchovies are so cheap!--never.” Then rushing into the market, he had
bought up the whole stock-in-trade of coriander-seed and wild
onions--seasoning for the anchovies--and presented them with a little
all round. This won their hearts completely. “In short,” says this
practical politician, “I bought the whole Senate for sixpennyworth of
coriander-seed!” A tolerably severe satire upon the highest deliberative
assembly at Athens.
But Cleon is not conquered yet. Rushing on the stage in a storm of fury,
he vows he will drag his rival before PEOPLE himself. There no one will
have any chance against him; for he knows the old gentleman’s humour
exactly, and feeds him with the nice soft pap which he likes. “Ay,” says
the other--“and, like the nurses, you swallow three mouthfuls for every
one you give him.” He is perfectly willing to submit their respective
claims to the master whose stewardship they are contending for. So both
knock loudly at Demus’s door; and the impersonation of the great
Athenian Commons comes out--not in very good case as regards dress and
personal comforts, as may be gathered from the dialogue which follows;
his majordomo has not taken over-good care of him, after all.
The rival claimants seize him affectionately by either arm, and profess
their attachment; while he eyes them both with a divided favour, like
Captain Macheath in our comic opera. “I love you,” says the
Paphlagonian: “I love you better,” says the other. “Remember, I brought
you the Spartans from Pylos.”[14] “A pretty service,” says the
Black-pudding-man,--“just like the mess of meat once I stole which
another man had cooked.” “Call a public assembly, and decide the matter,
then,” says Cleon. “No--not in the assembly--not in the Pnyx,” begs the
other; “Demus is an excellent fellow at home, but once set him down at a
public meeting, and he goes wild!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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