Ragouts, pancakes, fritters, wine, rich cake, hare-pie, are all tendered
him in succession. This last is brought by Cleon; but the other
cunningly directs his attention to some foreign envoys, whom he declares
he sees coming with bags of gold; and while Cleon runs to pounce upon
the money, he gets possession of the pie, and presents it as his own
offering--“Just as you did the prisoners from Pylos, you know.” Demus
eats in turn of all the good things, and grows quite bewildered as to
his choice between two such admirable purveyors. He cannot see on which
side his best interests lie, and at last appeals helplessly to the
audience to advise him. The Black-pudding-man proposes that as a test of
the honesty of their service, he should search the lockers of each of
them. His own proves to be empty; he has given all he had. But in the
Paphlagonian’s are found concealed all manner of good things, especially
a huge cake, from which it appears he had cut off but a miserable slice
for his master. This decides the question: Cleon is peremptorily desired
to surrender his office at once. He makes a last struggle, and a scene
ensues which reads like an antedated parody on the last meeting of
Macbeth and Macduff. He holds an oracle which forewarns him of the only
man who can overthrow his power. Where was his antagonist educated, and
how?--“By the cuffs and blows of the scullions in the kitchen.” What did
his next master teach him!--“To steal, and then swear he did not.”
Cleon’s mind misgives him. What is his trade, and where does he practise
it? And when he learns that his rival sells black-puddings at the city
gates, he knows that all is over--Birnam Wood is come to Dunsinane. He
wildly tears his hair, and takes his farewell in the most approved vein
of tragedy.
“O me! the oracles of heaven are sped!
Bear me within, unhappy! O farewell
Mine olive crown! Against my will I leave thee,
A trophy for another’s brow to wear;
Perchance to prove more fortunate than me;
But greater rascal he can never be.”[16]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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