But the next act of the comedy brings in Socrates, swearing by all his
new divinities that he never met with so utterly hopeless a pupil, in
the whole course of his experience, as this very late learner, who has
no one qualification for a sophist except his want of honesty. He puts
him through a quibbling catechism on the stage about measures, and
rhythms, and grammar, all which he declares are necessary preliminaries
to the grand science which Strepsiades desires to learn, although the
latter very naïvely remonstrates against this superfluous education: he
wants to learn neither music nor grammar, but simply how to defeat his
creditors. At last his instructor gets out of patience, and kicks him
off the philosophical premises as a hopeless dunce. By the advice of the
Clouds the rejected candidate goes in search of his son, to attempt once
more to persuade him to enter the schools, and learn the art which has
proved too difficult for his father’s duller faculties.
One step, indeed, the old gentleman has made in his education; he swears
no more by Jupiter, and rebukes his son, when he does so, for
entertaining such very old-world superstitions; somewhat to the
astonishment of that elegant young gentleman, whose opinions (if he has
any on such subjects) are not so far advanced in the way of scepticism.
The latter is, however, at last persuaded to become his father’s
substitute as the pupil of Socrates, though not without a warning on the
young man’s part that he may one day come to rue it. On this head the
father has no misgivings, but introduces him to the philosopher
triumphantly as a scholar who is sure to do him credit--he was always a
remarkable child:--
He was so very clever always, naturally;
When he was but so high, now, he’d build mud houses,
Cut out a boat, make a cart of an old shoe,
And frogs out of pomegranate-stones--quite wonderful![34]
And Socrates, after a sneer at the young gentleman’s fashionable lisp,
admits him as a pupil, and undertakes to instruct him in this “new way
of paying old debts.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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