"Ask Mamma"; or, The Richest Commoner In EnglandSurtees, Robert Smith
General
"Ask Mamma"; or, The Richest Commoner In England
Surtees, Robert Smith
England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Fox hunting -- Fiction
“Well done you! First down, I do declare!” exclaimed he,
tendering him his left hand, his right one being occupied with
his kerchief. “Sit down, and let’s be at it,” continued he,
kicking a rush-bottomed chair under Billy as it were, adding
“never wait for any man on a hunting morning.” So saying, he
proceeded to snatch an egg, in doing which he upset the
cream-jug. “Dom the thing,” growled he, “what the deuce do they
set it there for. D’ye take tea?” now asked he, pointing to the
tea-pot with his knife—“or coffee?” continued he, pointing to the
coffee-pot with his fork, “or both praps,” added he, without
waiting for an answer to either question, but pushing both pots
towards his guest, following up the advance with ham, eggs,
honey, buns, butter, bread, toast, jelly, everything within
reach, until he got Billy fairly blocked with good things, when
he again set-to on his own account, munching and crunching, and
ended by nearly dragging all the contents of the table on to the
floor by catching the cloth with his spur as he got up to go
away.
He then went doming and scuttling out of the room, charging Billy
if he meant to go with the hounds to “look sharp.”
During his absence Stephen Booty and Mr. Silverthorn came
dawdling into the room, taking it as easy as men generally do who
have their horses on and don’t care much about hunting.
Indeed Silverthorn never disguised that he would rather have his
covers under plough than under gorse, and was always talking
about the rent he lost, which he estimated at two pounds an acre,
and Sir Moses at ten shillings.
Finding the coast clear, they now rang for fresh ham, fresh eggs,
fresh tea, fresh everything, and then took to pumping Billy as to
his connection with the house, Sir Moses having made him out over
night to be a son of Sir Jonathan Pringle’s, with whom he
sometimes claimed cousinship, and they wanted to get a peep at
the baronetage if they could. In the midst of their subtle
examination, Sir Moses came hurrying back, whip in one hand, hat
in the other, throwing open the door, with, “Now, are you ready?”
to Billy, and “morning, gentlemen,” to Booty and Silverthorn.
Then Billy rose with the desperate energy of a man going to a
dentist’s, and seizing his cap and whip off the entrance table,
followed Sir Moses through the intricacies of the back passages
leading to the stables, nearly falling over a coal-scuttle as he
went. They presently changed the tunnel-like darkness of the
passage into the garish light of day, by the opening of the dirty
back door.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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