"I ... heated it," said Moira. "You know how hot metal smells. I heated
a steel hairpin and the dinies came out of holes in the wall, right
away! The smell drew them. It was astonishing!"
The president looked at her with a strange expression.
"That's ... that's all I had time to try," said Moira. "It was
yesterday afternoon. There was an official dinner. I had to go. You
remember! So I locked up the dinies----"
"Moira darlin'," said President O'Hanrahan gently, "you don't lock up
dinies. They gnaw through steel safes. They make tunnels and nests in
electric dynamos. You don't lock up dinies, darlin'!"
"But I did!" she insisted. "They're still locked up. I looked just
before we started for here!"
The president looked at her very unhappily.
"There's no need for shenanigans between us, Moira!" Then he said:
"Couldn't ye be mistaken? Keepin' dinies locked up is like bottlin'
moonlight or writin' down the color of Moira O'Donohue's eyes or----"
He stopped. "How did ye do it?"
"The way you keep specimens," she told him. "When I was in college we
did experiments on frogs. They're cold-blooded just like dinies. If you
let them stay lively, they'll wear themselves out trying to get away.
So you put them in a refrigerator. In the vegetable container. They
don't freeze there, but they do ... get torpid. They just lay still
till you let them warm up again. To room temperature."
The president of the planet Eire stared. His mouth dropped open. He
blinked and blinked and blinked. Then he whooped. He reached forward
and took Moira into his arms. He kissed her thoroughly.
"Darlin'!" he said in a broken voice. "Sit still while I drive this
boat back to the mainland! I've to get back to Tara immediate! You've
done it, my darlin', you've done it, and it's a great day for the
Irish! It's even a great day for the Erse! It's your birthday will be a
planetary holiday long after we're married and our grandchildren think
I'm as big a nuisance as your grandfather Sean O'Donohue! It's a fine
grand marriage we'll be havin'----"
He kissed her again and whirled the boat about and sent it streaking
for the mainland. From time to time he whooped. Rather more frequently,
he hugged Moira exuberantly. And she tended to look puzzled, but she
definitely looked pleased.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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