“Fellow-poets, rats! Where d’ you get that stuff?” protested Vergil
Gunch. “I suppose Dante showed a lot of speed for an old-timer--not that
I’ve actually read him, of course--but to come right down to hard facts,
he wouldn’t stand one-two-three if he had to buckle down to practical
literature and turn out a poem for the newspaper-syndicate every day,
like Chum does!”
“That’s so,” from Eddie Swanson. “Those old birds could take their time.
Judas Priest, I could write poetry myself if I had a whole year for it,
and just wrote about that old-fashioned junk like Dante wrote about.”
Frink demanded, “Hush, now! I’ll call him.... O, Laughing Eyes, emerge
forth into the, uh, the ultimates and bring hither the spirit of Dante,
that we mortals may list to his words of wisdom.”
“You forgot to give um the address: 1658 Brimstone Avenue, Fiery
Heights, Hell,” Gunch chuckled, but the others felt that this was
irreligious. And besides--“probably it was just Chum making the knocks,
but still, if there did happen to be something to all this, be exciting
to talk to an old fellow belonging to--way back in early times--”
A thud. The spirit of Dante had come to the parlor of George F. Babbitt.
He was, it seemed, quite ready to answer their questions. He was “glad
to be with them, this evening.”
Frink spelled out the messages by running through the alphabet till the
spirit interpreter knocked at the right letter.
Littlefield asked, in a learned tone, “Do you like it in the Paradiso,
Messire?”
“We are very happy on the higher plane, Signor. We are glad that you are
studying this great truth of spiritualism,” Dante replied.
The circle moved with an awed creaking of stays and shirtfronts.
“Suppose--suppose there were something to this?”
Babbitt had a different worry. “Suppose Chum Frink was really one of
these spiritualists! Chum had, for a literary fellow, always seemed to
be a Regular Guy; he belonged to the Chatham Road Presbyterian Church
and went to the Boosters’ lunches and liked cigars and motors and racy
stories. But suppose that secretly-- After all, you never could tell
about these darn highbrows; and to be an out-and-out spiritualist would
be almost like being a socialist!”
No one could long be serious in the presence of Vergil Gunch. “Ask Dant’
how Jack Shakespeare and old Verg’--the guy they named after me--are
gettin’ along, and don’t they wish they could get into the movie game!”
he blared, and instantly all was mirth. Mrs. Jones shrieked, and Eddie
Swanson desired to know whether Dante didn’t catch cold with nothing on
but his wreath.
The pleased Dante made humble answer.
But Babbitt--the curst discontent was torturing him again, and heavily,
in the impersonal darkness, he pondered, “I don’t-- We’re all so flip
and think we’re so smart. There’d be-- A fellow like Dante-- I wish I’d
read some of his pieces. I don’t suppose I ever will, now.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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