Sir Henry Wilberforce wrung his hands in helpless despair at this
inexplicable inroad of so many aggressive strangers. 'Upon my word,' he
said piteously, 'I wish to goodness I'd never seen or heard at all of
this extraordinary young man Churchill. Such a deuce of a hullabaloo and
corrobboree as they're kicking up about him, the whole three of them, I
never heard in all my confounded lifetime. Dash their geniuses! Who the
dickens wants a genius for a valet? I'll take precious good care, when
once I'm out of this deuced hobble, that I never engage a fellow who's
been first cousin to a marble-cutter as my servant in future. First this
young lady comes down upon me and lectures me in the name of high art,
what the devil do I mean by keeping this delightful young sculptor
pottering about as my own body-servant. And then this pair of Yankees
come down upon me, in the name of brotherly affection, and ask me what
the devil do I mean by keeping this eminently respectable brother of
theirs in a menial position that I never for a moment wanted him to get
into.--Why, what the devil do you mean yourself, sir, by invading my
premises in this unceremonious manner? Who the devil cares twopence
about you or your brother? If your brother's a sculptor, why the devil
doesn't he stick to his own profession? What the devil does he mean by
coming and passing himself off upon me as a servant? Will you have the
kindness, all of you, to leave my rooms at your earliest convenience,
and be dashed to you? And will you tell this interesting young sculptor,
if you see him, that he may pack up his traps and clear out as soon as
possible? That'll do, thank you. Good morning. Good morning.' And Sir
Henry stood with the door in his hand, waiting for the three to take
their departure.
That same evening, when Sir Henry came in from dinner much agitated, he
found an envelope lying on his table, which he took up and opened in a
surly fashion, saying to himself meanwhile: 'Some deuced impertinence
of that fellow Churchill, I'll be bound--the confounded rascal.' But
it contained only a couple of English bank-notes; a small memorandum of
Colin's railway expenses and other disbursements made by Sir Henry
on his account, as well as of the month's wages, due by a servant who
voluntarily leaves his master without full notice; and finally a
sheet of white note-paper, bearing the words, 'With Saml. Churchill's
compliments.'
Sir Henry crumpled up the paper and memorandum angrily, with hardly a
glance, and flung them into the empty grate; but he folded the notes
carefully, and put them into the inner compartment of his purse. Then
he sat down at his davenport and wrote out a telegram from Wilberforce,
Rome, to Dobbs, 74 Albert Terrace, Dalston, London. 'Come here at
once; expenses paid; wages raised five pounds; no boots thrown. Answer
immediately. W.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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