Country life -- Fiction; Pastoral fiction; Piedmont (U.S. : Region) -- Fiction; Virginia -- Fiction
Their first meeting in the road. The way he looked at her. His eyes when
he smiled. The red of his hair. His hand when he touched her. The
feeling of his arms, of his mouth on hers, of the rough surface of his
coat brushing her face. The first time he had kissed her. The last time
he had kissed her. No. It isn't true. It isn't true. Deep down in her
being some isolated point of consciousness, slow, rhythmic, monotonous,
like a swinging pendulum, was ticking over and over: It isn't true. It
isn't true. True. True. It isn't true. On the surface other thoughts
came and went. That horrible old man. A fire in summer. The stench of
drunkenness. Tobacco stains on his white beard. A rat watching her from
a hole. How she hated rats! Did he suspect something, and was he trying
to frighten her? Trying to frighten her. But she would let him see that
she was too strong for him. She was not afraid. . . . The thoughts went
on, coming and going like leaves blown in the wind, now rising, now
fluttering down again. But far away, in a blacker vacancy, the pendulum
still swung to and fro, and she heard the thin, faint ticking of the
solitary point of consciousness: _True. True. It isn't true. It isn't
true--true--true_--
No, he couldn't frighten her. She was too sure of herself. Too sure of
Jason, too sure of her happiness. "Too sure of Jason," she repeated
aloud.
The little sad, watery sun sputtered out like a lantern, and after a few
minutes of wan greyness, shone more clearly, as if it had been relighted
and hung up again in the sky. Colour flowed back into the landscape,
trickling in shallow streams of blue and violet through the nearer
fields and evaporating into dark fire where the broomsedge enkindled
the horizon. She started up quickly, and fell back. When she put her
hand on the slimy moss it felt like a toad.
Far down the road, somewhere in the vague blur of the distance, there
was the approaching rumble of wheels. She heard the even rise and fall
of the hoofs, the metallic clink of horseshoes striking together, the
jolting over the rock by the Sneads' pasture, the splash of mud in the
bad hole near the burned cabin, and the slip and scramble of the mare as
she stumbled and then, recovering herself, broke into a trot.
_It isn't true. It isn't true_, ticked the pin point of consciousness. Her
mind was still firm; but her limbs trembled so violently that she
slipped from the stump to the carpet of moss and soaked creepers.
Shutting her eyes, she held fast to the slimy branch of a tree. "When he
turns at the fork, I will look. I will not look until he turns at the
fork."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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