Barren Honour: A NovelLawrence, George A. (George Alfred)
General
Barren Honour: A Novel
Lawrence, George A. (George Alfred)
Fiction
"Dear Uncle Hubert, I own it was a grave fault. I am so sorry for not
having told you the secret first, that I hardly know how to ask even
_you_ to forgive me. But will you believe that there was no _malice
propense_? I swear that when I went out this afternoon, I had no more
idea of betraying myself to Helen than I had of proposing to any
Princess-Royal. I am sure I have no more right to aspire to one than the
other. But we were riding fast and carelessly through Holme Wood; a
branch caught Helen's _sombrero_, and held it fast. I went back for
it--we could not pull up for a second or two. When I joined her again,
she was trying to put in order some rebellious tresses which had escaped
from their net; the light shot down through the leaves on the dark
ripples of hair; there was the most delicious flush you can fancy on her
cheek, and her lips and eyes were laughing--so merrily! I don't believe
that the luck of painters ever let them dream of any thing half so
lovely. I suppose I've seen as many fair faces as most men of my age,
and I ought to be able to keep my head (if not my heart) by this time.
Well--_it went_, on the instant. I had no more self-control or
forethought than a schoolboy in his first love. Before I was aware, I
had said words that I ought never to have spoken, but which are very,
very hard to unsay. Don't ask me what she answered. I should have been
still unworthy of those words if, since my manhood begun, I had never
done one ill deed, never thrown one chance away. Uncle Hubert, you can't
blame me as much as I despise myself. The idea of a man's having got
through a good fortune and the best years of his life, without having
learnt--when to hold his tongue."
The clouds had been clearing fast on Vavasour's face while the other was
speaking, and the sun broke out, suddenly, in a kind, pleasant smile.
Probably more than one feeling was busy within him then, which it would
have been hard to separate or analyse. The father's heart swelled with
pride and love as he heard of this last crowning triumph of a beauty,
that, from childhood upwards, he had held to be peerless. Indeed, he was
absurdly fond of Helen, and had spoiled her so consistently, that no one
could understand why the _demoiselle_ (who certainly _had_ a will of her
own) was not more imperious and wayward. Besides this, the Squire's
strong natural sense of humour was gratified. It amused him unspeakably
to see his calm, impassible nephew for once so embarrassed as actually
to have been betrayed into blushing. More than all, gay memories of his
own youth and manhood came trooping up fast, some faint and distant,
some so near and brightly-coloured, that they almost seemed
tangible--vanishing and reappearing capriciously, as one fair vision
chased another from light into shade, like elves holding revel under a
midsummer moon.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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