Beauty contests -- Fiction; Science fiction; Short stories
The field trucks drove back just fourteen girls from the Play Area.
Lt. Hartwig was surprised at the low number, after his first hard-eyed
appraisal of the women. But a hundred and sixty-six of them had stuck
it out, with a perseverance that didn't quite fit his preconceived
idea about the durability of young women--particularly the kind of
young women who entered beauty contests.
But they stuck. They walked the four-mile distance to the test grounds
with playful good humor. They took the hurdles of the obstacle course
with only minor accidents. They joined in the water trials with gleeful
abandon. And they even forgot their aching feet when the whistle blew
for the running events.
The blonde that Hartwig had dated proved a frost in the first ten
minutes of the exercises. She balked at the obstacle course, and
pulled a fit of weeping. Hartwig himself helped her off the grounds,
and tried to be nice about it. But she seemed to want to blame him for
everything, and gave the young officer a tongue-lashing that brought a
blush to his face. She sat out the rest of the field trials in a truck,
waiting to be driven home. But that other blonde one, the pert one with
the curls and the stunning figure, the one from Cleveland; now that was
something more to Hartwig's liking. And the way she had taken the whole
thing with such dignity and good grace. He'd have to talk with her on
the way back....
"Okay, girls!" he called to them cheerfully, as they began the weary
trudge back to the spaceport. "I know you're all bushed, but if we
put a little pep into it, we can get back at two-thirty or so. That
will give you some time to freshen up before the outer-space question
period. You'll probably want to do some repair work on the makeup."
* * * * *
They made the march in less than half an hour.
Captain Johannson kept his eyes on the paper on his desk, pencil
poised, as the pretty girl in the chair watched him anxiously.
"I'm going to ask you some unusual questions," he said. "So don't be
surprised. You might call this a sort of 'psychological test.'"
The girl called Cleveland nodded.
"There won't be any pat answers, you understand. The outer-space
questions, as we call them, demand more--inventive answers, you might
say. So don't be nervous."
"All right," Cleveland said, none the less nervously.
"Here's the first question," said the captain. "Let's say you're in
your own home, and the water supply is suddenly turned off. And you
knew that it wouldn't work again for forty-eight hours. What would you
do?"
The girl stared. "Why, I'm not sure." She thought a while. "I suppose
I'd see if there were any water in the frig."
"Yes, of course," said the captain. "But what if you didn't have any
refrigeration equipment?"
"Well, I'd see if there were fruit or vegetables around. I'd get all
the juice I could find. I'd drink that."
"How about bathing?"
"I just wouldn't bathe. Not if I didn't want to be thirsty."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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