I well remember one man, who was in a terrible condition for the last
three months before he was carried to the hospital. He was a man of
about middle age, and his face was very white, and all day long he
was coughing and spitting in the kitchen, with only enough strength
in his body to take him to bed. Although I sat with my back to him at
meals, I could not help but hear the poor fellow, and could not help
a feeling of revulsion. In fact I began at last to look upon these
consumptives as murderers who, by their stubbornness in not going to
the hospital, were killing me and others with their breath.
Some of these men are in receipt of small pensions, or get a little
assistance from relatives on the outside, and for this reason they
die sooner; for they have more leisure than others--who must go out
to earn a few pennies--at the coke fire. Little Punch is dead, who
might have lived for many more years, had he not been kept indoors so
much by outside assistance. In the spring this little fellow used to
set off with his pack as a pedlar through the country, and when he
returned at the end of summer was always in good condition, but was
as bad as ever after a month in the lodging-house. I believe he could
have prolonged his life ten or fifteen years, if he had rambled both
winter and summer.
These men fight against going to the hospital and sit dying day after
day, making no complaint; until the lodging-house keeper is surprised
some morning to find them lying in bed, without the strength to rise.
Even then they swear it is only temporary indisposition, and that
after a few hours' rest they will be well again. Then the doctor is
called, and then comes the ambulance; but it is too late, for if
the men do not die on the way, they die soon after they reach the
hospital.
Poor old Peter saw himself wasting away. He was six feet two inches
in height, but thin enough to be exhibited. He kept himself alive
by a merry heart, but his hollow, spasmodic laughter refused to
make his body fat. Up to the last he affected great cheerfulness,
but he could not cheat death any longer. It was impossible to feel
any revulsion against Peter; he did not spit about the place, and
though he was always coughing, the poor fellow had no strength to
make a disturbing noise: he could not be heard if you were not seated
next him. You could feel him cough, by the vibration of the bench
or table, more often than you could hear him. I also believe that
he had consideration for others, knowing that a sick man can make
himself unpleasant. Peter did nothing but win pity and goodwill, and
he returned it by endeavouring to be witty and cheerful.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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