Beggars on HorsebackJesse, F. Tennyson (Fryniwyd Tennyson)
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Beggars on Horseback
Jesse, F. Tennyson (Fryniwyd Tennyson)
Fiction; Short stories, English
The next day both fell from their high altitude. They had driven to a
little half-deserted town, a white, dead, staring, crumbling place--a
place of blind windows and glaring silences. Both felt a sense of
tension, and leaving the carriage they wandered round the walls, and
climbing over a broken gap sat down on a grassy spur of the hillside,
with their backs to the terrible little town. As usual, by now, they
talked about themselves, chiefly of him, and he told her that though
several women had been fond of him as a friend and liked to "mother" him
even as she did, no one of them had cared for him in another way or
kissed him as a lover kisses. He slipped an arm round her shoulders as
he spoke. Sophia was as ignorant as an infant of what kissing like a
lover might be, and in a rush of pity and affection she turned her face
up towards him.
"Oh, it isn't as if we were going on afterwards like this," she said;
"this is just a bit cut out of life for me to give you. It's taking
nothing from her, she doesn't want to give you anything. And I want to
make this bit as splendid as I can for you."
He felt her shoulder touch his as she leant her warm young body towards
him, he saw the glory of her eager eyes and mouth, and he caught her to
him, crushing her fiercely. . . . Sophia wondered if this awful kiss were
ever going to stop; she had never known there was such a way of
kissing--a hard pressure, a sucking of her very soul--and she was filled
with horror under it. When he loosed her she turned and buried her face
against the wall. For a while they sat in silence, then she saw him
kissing her coat, her sleeve, then her head was pressed back against
the wall and his mouth came to hers again. She stayed passive, dazed. In
silence they went to the carriage and drove away, and almost silently
they parted. Sophia spent the night in a misery of shame, he spent it in
mingled excitement and remorse: fearful lest he had aroused in her a
passion which would need to be satisfied at the cost of social disaster.
Next day they talked of nothing in particular in a desultory way and did
not refer to what had happened until, wandering through one of the
wooded mountain slopes beyond Florence, they came on a tiny sportsman's
hut with a roof of red-fluted tiles and a huge chimney. Sophia peeped
and went in; he followed. Within, the hut was only about five feet
square; flame-coloured leaves had drifted in through the open doorway
and lay piled on the hearth; on the wall were some names rudely scrawled
in charcoal.
"How did you sleep?" he asked suddenly.
"I didn't. I was thinking what I should say to you to-day."
"What was it?"
"Never, never again be like you were yesterday. I didn't know it was
like that. It was dreadful. I can't bear it."
He took her hands and held them.
"Never, I promise you. I had an awful night. I didn't know what to think
or wish or do. Let's get out of this hut. It's too small."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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