The corporation stared at one another very hard at all this, and then
looked as if for explanation to the tall postilion, but as the tall
postilion was intently contemplating the gold tassel on the top of his
yellow cap, and could have afforded no explanation whatever, even if
his thoughts had been entirely disengaged, they contented themselves
with coughing very dubiously, and looking very grave. The tall postilion
then delivered another letter, in which Nicholas Tulrumble informed the
corporation, that he intended repairing to the town-hall, in grand state
and gorgeous procession, on the Monday afternoon then next ensuing. At
this, the corporation looked still more solemn; but, as the epistle
wound up with a formal invitation to the whole body to dine with the
Mayor on that day, at Mudfog Hall, Mudfog Hill, Mudfog, they began to
see the fun of the thing directly, and sent back their compliments, and
they'd be sure to come.
Now there happened to be in Mudfog, as somehow or other there does
happen to be, in almost every town in the British dominions, and perhaps
in foreign dominions too--we think it very likely, but, being no great
traveller, cannot distinctly say--there happened to be, in Mudfog a
merry-tempered, pleasant-faced, good-for-nothing sort of vagabond,
with an invincible dislike to manual labour, and an unconquerable
attachment to strong beer and spirits whom everybody knew, and nobody,
except his wife, took the trouble to quarrel with, who inherited from
his ancestors the appellation of Edward Twigger, and rejoiced in the
_sobriquet_ of Bottle-nosed Ned. He was drunk upon the average once
a day, and penitent upon an equally fair calculation once a month;
and when he was penitent, he was invariably in the very last stage of
maudlin intoxication. He was a ragged, roving, roaring kind of fellow,
with a burly form, a sharp wit, and a ready head, and could turn his
hand to anything when he chose to do it. He was by no means opposed to
hard labour on principle, for he would work away at a cricket-match by
the day together,--running, and catching, and batting, and bowling, and
revelling in toil which would exhaust a galley-slave. He would have been
invaluable to a fire-office; never was a man with such a natural taste
for pumping engines, running up ladders, and throwing furniture out of
two-pair-of-stairs' windows: nor was this the only element in which he
was at home; he was a humane society in himself, a portable drag, an
animated life-preserver, and had saved more people, in his time, from
drowning, than the Plymouth life-boat, or Captain Manby's apparatus.
With all these qualifications, notwithstanding his dissipation,
Bottle-nosed Ned was a general favourite; and the authorities of Mudfog,
remembering his numerous services to the population, allowed him in
return to get drunk in his own way, without the fear of stocks, fine, or
imprisonment. He had a general licence, and he showed his sense of the
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account