However, when Eliza--originally a hard, strong woman--took to her bed
with incurable disease, Mary Anne Waller came in to help, and was
accepted. She did everything humbly; she even let Louisa order her
about. But before the end, Eliza had come to be restless when she was
not there.
Now, however, Eliza knew no more, and the little widow sat gazing at
her with the tears on her cheeks. John, too, felt his eyes wet.
But after half an hour, when there was still no change, he was turning
away to go back to bed, when the widow touched his arm.
"Won't yer give her a kiss, John?" she said timidly. "She wor a good
sister to you."
John, with a tremor, stooped, and clumsily did as he was told--the
first time in his life he had ever done so for Mary Anne. Then,
stepping as noiselessly as he could on his bare feet, he hurried away.
A man shares nothing of that yearning attraction which draws women to a
death-bed as such. Instead, John felt a sudden sickness at his heart.
He was thankful to find himself in his own room again, and thought with
dread of having to go back--for the end. In spite of his still
vigorous and stalwart body, he was often plagued with nervous fears and
fancies. And it was years now since he had seen death--he had,
indeed, carefully avoided seeing it.
Gradually, however, as he sat on the edge of his bed in the summer
dark, the new impression died away, and something habitual took its
place--that shielding, solacing thought, which was in truth all the
world to him, and was going to make up to him for Eliza's death, for
getting old, and the lonesomeness of a man without chick or child. He
would have felt unutterably forlorn and miserable, he would have shrunk
trembling from the shapes of death and pain that seemed to fill the
darkness, but for this fact, this defence, this treasure, that set him
apart from his fellows and gave him this proud sense of superiority, of
a good time coming in spite of all. Instinctively, as he sat on the
bed, he pushed his bare foot backwards till his heel touched a wooden
object that stood underneath. The contact cheered him at once. He
ceased to think about Eliza, his head was once more full of whirling
plans and schemes.
The wooden object was a box that held his money, the savings of a
labourer's lifetime. Seventy-one pounds! It seemed to him an ocean of
gold, never to be exhausted. The long toil of saving it was almost
done. After the Frampton job, he would begin enjoying it, cautiously
at first, taking a bit of work now and again, and then a bit of holiday.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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