"As you are aware, the synapse operates on the binary 'yes-no' choice
system of an electronic calculator. All synapses which were involved in
the diseased personality have now been reduced to an atypical, uniform
threshold. Thus they can be re-educated in new patterns by the healthy
personality remaining.... There, you see the countenance of the healthy
personality appearing."
* * * * *
It was Conrad Manz who looked up at them with a wry grin. He rotated
his shoulders to loosen them. "How many of you pushed old Bill Walden
around? He left me with some sore muscles. Well, I did that often
enough to him...."
Major Grey stood over him, face sick and white with the horror of
what he had seen. "According to law, Mr. Manz, you and your wife are
entitled to five rest days on your next shift. When they are over, you
will, of course, report for suspended animation for what would have
been your hyperalter's shift."
Conrad Manz's grin shrank and vanished. "_Would_ have been? Bill
is--gone?"
"Yes."
"I never thought I'd miss him." Conrad looked as sick as Major Grey
felt. "It makes me feel--I don't know if I can explain it--sort of
_amputated_. As though something's wrong with me because everybody else
has an alter and I don't. Did the poor son of a straitjacket suffer
much?"
"I'm afraid he did."
Conrad Manz lay still for a moment with his eyes closed and his mouth
thin with pity and remorse. "What will happen to Helen?"
"She'll be all right," Major Grey said. "There will be Bill's
insurance, naturally, and she won't have much trouble finding another
husband. That kind never seems to."
"Five rest days?" Conrad repeated. "Is that what you said?" He sat up
and swung his legs off the table, and he was grinning again. "I'll get
in a whole shift of jet-skiing! No, wait--I've got a date with the wife
of a friend of mine out at the rocket grounds. I'll take Clara out
there; she'll like some of the men."
Major Grey nodded abstractedly. "Good idea." He shook hands with
Conrad Manz, wished him fun on his rest shift, and left.
Taking a helicopter back to his city, Major Grey thought of his own
hyperalter, Ralph Singer. He'd often wished that the silly fool
could be erased. Now he wondered how it would be to have only one
personality, and, wondering, realized that Conrad Manz had been
right--it _would_ be like amputation, the shameful distinction of
living in a schizophrenic society with no alter.
No, Bill Walden had been wrong, completely wrong, both about drugs
and being split into two personalities. What one made up in pleasure
through not taking drugs was more than lost in the suffering of
conflict, frustration and hostility. And having an alter--any kind,
even one as useless as Singer--meant, actually, _not being alone_.
Major Grey parked the helicopter and found a shifting station. He took
off his makeup, addressed and mailed his clothes, and waited for the
shift to come.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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