Beyond These VoicesBraddon, M. E. (Mary Elizabeth)
General
Beyond These Voices
Braddon, M. E. (Mary Elizabeth)
Fiction
Let her be happy in her own way. He had sworn to make her happy: and
if it was her nature to delight in trivial things, if the aimless
existence of a rich man's sultana was her idea of bliss, she should
reign sole mistress of a harem which he would never enter while he
believed himself unwelcome there. Vera accepted this gradual drifting
apart as something inevitable, for which she was not to blame. The
strong man's impassioned love, which had appealed to the romantic side
of her character, had languished and died with the passing years.
She brooded on the change with sorrowful wonder before she became
accustomed to the idea that the lover who had taken her to his heart
with a cry of ineffable rapture had ceased to exist in the grave man
of business, whose preoccupied manner and absent gaze, as of one
looking at things far away, chilled her when she sat opposite him on
those rare occasions when they dined _tête-à-tête_--occasions when the
dinner-table was only a glittering spot in the dark spaciousness of the
room, a world of shadows, where the footmen moved like ghosts in the
area between the table and the far-off sideboard. They had been married
six years; but Vera thought sadly that her husband looked twenty years
older than the companion by whose side she had climbed the mule-paths,
through the lemon orchards and olive woods of San Marco, the man whose
conversation had always interested her, her first friend, her first
lover.
She accepted the change as inevitable, having been taught by the wives
of her acquaintance to believe that marriage was the death of love, and
as gradually as she learned to dispense with her husband's society,
so guiltlessly, because unconsciously, she came to depend upon Claude
Rutherford for sympathy and companionship.
She did not know that she loved him, though she knew that the day when
they did not meet seemed a long-drawn-out weariness, and that when the
evening shadows came, they brought a sense of desolation and a strange
lassitude, as of one weighed down by intolerable burdens.
All occupations and all amusements were burdens if Claude was not
sharing them--Society the heaviest of all. Far easier to endure the
dreary day in the solitude of her den, with the faces of her beloved
dead looking at her, than among empty-headed people, who could only
talk of what other empty-headed people were doing, or were going to
do, with that light spice of malice which makes other people's mistakes
and misfortunes so piquant and interesting.
Claude Rutherford had become a part of her life, and life was
meaningless without him: a fatal stage in the downhill path, but it
was a long time before her awakened conscience gave the first note of
warning.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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