Conduct of life -- Fiction; Happiness -- Fiction; Human-alien encounters -- Fiction; Science fiction; Space colonies -- Fiction
He could have all the council members jailed, he thought. Only there
weren't any jails on Nemar.
Resentment burned in him. They'd let him work and struggle and slave
day and night--for this. He swung his fist into the wall suddenly, with
all his might. The pain stung, but he felt a little better.
He looked at the bruised hand, wondering what to do. He was too
restless to go home and stay by himself, burning up with unspent rage;
and he certainly couldn't go and sit among the natives, listening to
them chatter and laugh.
He decided to take a walk.
He heard a rustle of leaves after he had gone a little way and saw a
pair of feminine legs through the underbrush. He tried to turn aside.
He didn't feel like talking to Jeannette now.
But she had already seen him. "Hello, there," she said, pushing aside a
branch from where she was sitting. "Are you taking a walk, too? Thought
you were always sticking to the old grindstone this time of day."
"Hello, Jeannette."
"Sit down and rest for a minute. I need some company."
He hesitated, then sat down reluctantly.
"You don't look too cheerful," she said, looking at him. "Something
eating you?"
"Just this place," he said wearily. "And the people."
"Yes, it gets you after a while, doesn't it? It's pretty hard to take."
He leaned against a tree and tried to relax.
"It's hard to live with," she went on, "the constant sense of
inferiority...."
He wondered if he had heard her correctly. "What did you say?"
"I said, it's hard to live with."
"No, no. I meant the last part."
"The constant sense of inferiority. Is something the ma--"
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about the Nemarians, naturally."
"You surely don't consider them superior to us!" he said incredulously.
"Let's not fool ourselves," she said. "There isn't one of them that
isn't superior to every Terran here."
He stared at her.
"Of course, we do fool ourselves. I've been doing it a long time. Or
trying to, anyway. But I've been sitting here thinking. Among other
things, about why I didn't leave on that ship you came on, as I'd
planned."
"Why didn't you?" he asked.
"The same reason nobody else did, but Jerwyn; and he had to."
"Plenty of them don't like it here," he said. "There's plenty of
griping."
"Not really," she said. "It's not really griping. It's just a way of
making yourself feel better. Only the ones who haven't been here too
long do it, and one or two others who are real old-line die-hards, like
your Mr. Cortland.
"Why didn't you leave?"
"Because this is a good deal, of course. The climate's lovely; the
scenery's beautiful; life is sort of a perpetual pleasure outing. The
only trouble is, you're always on the fringes. You're the kid from
across the tracks."
"I don't understand."
"That wasn't the right phrase, because that implies snobbishness, and
they're not snobbish. But they don't quite accept you. They let you
hang around; they let you play with them. But you're not really one of
them."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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