"Of no use," said the Rector. "You will perceive, my dear Buddle, that the generality of the bench are either very fond of power, and flattered with Puseyite sycophancy; or anxious to keep pace with the titled aristocracy, and very fond of 'gentility.' Now there is no denying that the Tractarians are more polished men, and, as far as the arts and refinements go, more cultivated men than the labouring clergy generally, and therefore these two things keep them secure from any authoritative condemnation--their truckling to their spiritual superiors, and their standing in society. If Mount Huxtable had been a vulgar fellow, though with the energy and holiness of St Paul,--if he had stood up against his diocesan and vindicated his liberty, either of speech or action, in the slightest degree--we could have hurled him from the parish, probably into gaol, in spite of all the licenses in the world; but I have no hope in this case." "Then I have," I said, "for, from what you told me of the fellow's hypocrisy, I have no doubt he was the very man who was received, as they call it, into the Romish Church by Bishop Cunningham, three months since." "It is surely impossible, my dear Buddle; how could he officiate in our church after being a professed papist?" "Easily, my dear Smiler; it has very often been done, and is frequently done at this moment. Take that account of the ceremony with you, and tax him with it at once." The Doctor folded up the paper, and went on,-- "But this is not all. How am I to atone to poor Mrs Blazer, and poor Mrs Swainlove, for what has happened?" "Why?--what has happened to the old ladies?" "Jones has eloped with Araminta Blazer; and, in the same post-chaise, Smith has carried off Tinderella Swainlove!" "Why, they were almost professed unbelievers,--at least not at all Tractarian." "That doesn't matter. They are off, and what we have now to hope for is--that they will go to Gretna Green. Young Pulser also has kicked Mr Rowdy into the mill-pond, where he was nearly drowned, for something or other he said or did to Priscilla Pulser at confession; and, to complete the catalogue of woes, Mr Swallowlies has been arrested for theft; for it appears that the calf which Janet Wheedler sold him was not her own, but belonged to farmer Ruffhead."