Chapman appeared greatly amused by the irritated manner of his sister,
for he smiled in that ghastly way of his as he leaned back in his chair,
still with his violoncello resting between his legs, and said,
“You see, Arabella, there may be a great difference in the way we regard
the affairs of life. Doubtless scientific researches may not afford
much pleasure to a spinster of your age, but such researches are very
attractive to me.”
“All I can add to the opinion already expressed is that when your
so-called scientific researches not alone lead you to assume the
character of an outcast, and cause you to wander about at night like
a homeless cat, but also induce you to make our home a receptacle for
all the stray, vulgar, dirty negroes that happen to come to Boston, I
must certainly protest against indulgence in such researches by you,”
retorted the elderly maiden severely, as she cast her glances about her
immaculately clean apartment, and remembered some disagreeable event of
the last few months.
David was highly amused by this speech, for he gave utterance to a
cackling kind of laugh and exclaimed,
“Arabella, you’ll never get to heaven if the road be muddy. You will be
fearful of getting your skirts soiled. I shall be right sorry for your
soul if the path to the other place be clean. I fear in that event that
nothing could hold you back from going straight to Hades.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, David. You know full well that I am no more
particular about tidiness than every other decent woman.”
What monomaniac on the subject of cleanliness ever thought otherwise?
“I insist,” continued Miss Arabella indignantly, “that when one indulges
a fad to the extent of disarranging an entire household, under the
pretense that it is part of a scientific research, it is time to protest
against such proceedings.”
“Oh, I don’t imagine that the entire household has seriously suffered by
my investigations in the field of ethnology,” replied the brother still
enjoying his sister’s perturbation of mind as she recalled some recent
experiences.
“It may be highly amusing to you, David. I hope that you enjoy the joke,
but it has been anything but amusing to me and to Bridget, having to
clean, rub and air every article of furniture in the house two or three
times each week, and it is no laughing matter to freeze while the cold
wind blows the disgusting odors left by your guest out of the rooms.
Bridget has notified me that she will leave if you continue to make a
hostelry for dirty darkies out of the house,” said the sister fairly
shivering at the remembrance of the condition in which she had found her
spotless premises after a visit of some of her brother’s newly found
associates.
“I don’t think that I am the only member of this family that has a hobby,
Arabella,” replied Chapman grinning at the flushed little lady.
“I am unaware of what you refer to, David. I certainly have no such
uncomfortable idiosyncrasy as a hard ridden hobby.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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