One can't start fair upon any voyage without preparations, so I must put in another word or two to tell you that there were two logs kept on board the good ship _Teaser_--one by the chief officer, and in which the captain often put down his opinion. This is not that, but my own private log; and I'm afraid that if the skipper or Lieutenant Reardon had ever seen it he would have had a few words of a sort to say to me-- words which I would rather not have heard. It was a gloriously fine morning. We had been dodging about the coast on and off for a month on the look-out for piratical junks and lorchas, had found none, and were now lying at anchor in the mouth of the Nyho river, opposite the busy city of that name. Lastly, we three had leave to go ashore for the day, and were just off when the first lieutenant came and stood in the gangway, just as I have said, and the Tanner had told the coxswain to shove off. "Stop!" cried our tyrant loudly; and the oars which were being dropped into the pea-soupy water were tossed up again and held in a row. "Oh my!" groaned Barkins. "Eh?" cried the first lieutenant sharply. "What say?" and he looked hard at me. "I didn't speak, sir." "Oh, I thought you did. Well, young gentlemen, you are going ashore for the day. Not by my wish, I can assure you." "No, sir," said Smith, and he received a furious look. "Was that meant for impertinence, sir?" "I beg pardon, sir; no, sir." "Oh, I'm very glad it was not. I was saying it was not by my wish that you are going ashore, for I think you would be all better employed in your cabin studying navigation." "Haven't had a holiday for months, sir," said Barkins, in a tone of remonstrance. "Well, sir, what of that? Neither have I. Do you suppose that the discipline of Her Majesty's ships is to be kept up by officers thinking of nothing else but holidays? Now, listen to me--As you are going-- recollect that you are officers and gentlemen, and that it is your duty to bear yourselves so as to secure respect from the Chinese inhabitants of the town." "Yes, sir," we said in chorus. "You will be very careful not to get into any scrapes." "Of course, sir." "And you will bear in mind that you are only barbarians--" "And foreign devils, sir." "Thank you, Mr Smith," said the lieutenant sarcastically. "You need not take the words out of my mouth. I was going to say foreign devils--" "I beg pardon, sir." "--In the eyes of these self-satisfied, almond-eyed Celestials. They would only be too glad of an excuse to mob you or to declare that you had insulted them, so be careful." "Certainly, sir." "Perhaps you had better not visit their temples." Smith kicked me. "Or their public buildings." Barkins trod on my toe. "In short, I should be extremely guarded; and I think, on further consideration, I will go to the captain and suggest that you have half-a-dozen marines with you." "Captain's ashore, sir."