Blue-Stocking Hall, (Vol. 1 of 3)Scargill, William Pitt
General
Blue-Stocking Hall, (Vol. 1 of 3)
Scargill, William Pitt
Epistolary fiction; Women -- Conduct of life -- Fiction; Women -- Education -- Fiction
You see that I have _first_ registered my own part in our
engagement, and generously bound myself, before I proceed to tie
you down.--Now for _your_ undertaking. Remember, that when you
reach the wilds of Kerry, you are under a heavy bond to devote a
part of every day regularly to the task which I have assigned you
of narrating, in minute detail, every circumstance connected with
the external situation, personal appearance, mind, manners, and
habits of your aunt and her family. Aye, there I see you at this
instant in a full roar of laughter: so be it.--I am case-hardened;
and have so long endured your merriment with becoming philosophy,
that I am not to be subdued by a little louder ridicule than you
are accustomed to level at my _romance_. Well, I will confess (now
that I am a few miles distant from that taunting smile), that my
notions are somewhat odd, quaint, old fashioned, or romantic if
you will; and in return for this concession, I only ask that you
will bear with me, and indulge your friend's peculiarities, as they
are at least harmlessly eccentric. The bias of my mind is to be
traced without difficulty to the circumstances of my early life,
so different from your own, that it would be very extraordinary if
much dissimilarity were not discoverable in our ways of thinking.
My boyish years were passed in the seclusion of almost perfect
solitude, with a mother, whose image lives indelibly engraven on
my heart. A child of feeble frame, I was unable in early life to
bear the "peltings of the pitiless storm," and from every wind that
would have visited my infant form too roughly, did the tenderest
of maternal affections shroud, without enervating, my childhood.
My widowed mother was every thing to me--my friend, my tutor, my
protectress, my play-fellow--my all on earth. In losing her at
sixteen, I was left a mere wreck upon the ocean of life; and, while
"Memory holds her seat," never shall I forget the sweet expression
of her elegant and feminine countenance, as it spoke the language
of love, kindness, or pity; nor shall I ever lose the recollection
of that fine understanding which sparkled through her eye, in the
brightest scintillations of intellectual energy, and acuteness.
She was my _Gamaliel_, and no wonder if her lessons, her thoughts,
her sentiments, have left traces upon my mind not easily to be
obliterated. When I entered Cambridge, I felt no affection for any
living creature. Relations I had none, that were not too remote to
fill the chasm which death had created in my heart. My guardian,
though an excellent man, only put me painfully in mind of my
bereavement, when he attempted to condole or advise; and I turned
from him, not with disrespect, but in disgust with all created
things.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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