"Ah, hah! Oh, yes, he's one of the men that was blowed up. And he's
stayin' at your house. Ah, hah! He's about the last of 'em, ain't he? I
heard that all that wan't dead had put off somewhere. Never was blowed
up, that is, by a boat, but I've went through mighty nigh everything
else. Almost hugged to death by a bear down in the canebrake just
before the June rise eight year ago. Don't reckon your friend was ever
hugged by a bear," he went on, speaking of me as if I were not there.
"No," I answered.
"Then you've got a good deal to look forward to," he replied,
recognizing that, like Paul, I was permitted to speak for myself. "I've
had a good many things to happen to me, first and last, but I don't know
of anything worse than a bear's hug, unless it is son-in-laws."
The Senator began to laugh and I looked at Mr. Peters for an
explanation. He did not keep me waiting.
"I've got seven son-in-laws down yonder in my house right now," he said,
"dusting" his hands again and putting them back on on the tire. "Every
time a gal of mine gits married she goes away for a few days with her
husband, and then fetches him back with the ague; and he settles down in
my house and there he shakes. Got seven of them down there now a-shakin'
fit to kill themselves. If you'll step over there on that rise, you can
look down in the bottoms and see my house, and I'll bet you it's
a-tremblin' like a leaf right now. Them seven fellers keep it a-shakin'
all the time. Yes, Sir. Now, when Mag took a man, I says, says I, 'Mag,
I have always looked on you as the smartest one of the family, and I
want you to do me a favor; I want you to see if you can't take that
feller of your'n so far away that he can't git back.' And, Sir, I sold
my oats and give her the money, and she cleared out, but in less than a
month here she come, with her husband shakin' like a wet dog. I told him
to go in and find shakin' room if he could, and he crowded his way up to
the fireplace, and there he sets this minute, a-shakin' like a pound of
calfsfoot jelly."
"Look here, Bugg," said the Senator, laughing, "why don't you move out
of the bottoms?"
"What, and go up in the hills and ketch some new-fangled disease that I
don't know nothin' about? I reckon not, Senator. I've learned to let
well enough alone, and jest ordinary everyday chills is good enough for
me. Mister, how long are you goin' to be with us?" he inquired of me.
"I don't know exactly. I wanted to go yesterday, but the Senator
wouldn't hear to it."
"Well, I don't reckon you are able to do much knockin' about yet. Don't
believe I'd be snatched, anyway. Like for you to come down to see us
before you go. I can show you about the finest and shakinest set of
son-in-laws you ever saw. Did think somethin' of showin' 'em at the
State Fair this fall. But say, gentle_men_, you must sorter excuse me
for stoppin' you; but I wanted to see the Senator on business."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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