England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; English fiction -- 19th century
The mother had enough discretion to keep silence, and Godwin, after in
vain trying to settle to his book again, left the room with disturbed
countenance.
He had now been attending the day-school for about a year, and was
distinctly ahead of his coevals. A Christmas examination was on the
point of being held, and it happened that a singular test of the lad's
moral character coincided with the proof of his intellectual progress.
In a neighbouring house lived an old man named Rawmarsh, kindly but
rather eccentric; he had once done a good business as a printer, and
now supported himself by such chance typographic work of a small kind
as friends might put in his way. He conceived an affection for Godwin;
often had the boy to talk with him of an evening. On one such occasion,
Mr. Rawmarsh opened a desk, took forth a packet of newly printed
leaves, and with a mysterious air silently spread them before the boy's
eyes. In an instant Godwin became aware that he was looking at the
examination papers which a day or two hence would be set before him at
school; he saw and recognised a passage from the book of Virgil which
his class had been reading.
'That is _sub rosa_, you know,' whispered the old printer, with half
averted face.
Godwin shrank away, and could not resume the conversation thus
interrupted. On the following day he went about with a feeling of
guilt. He avoided the sight of Mr. Rawmarsh, for whom he had suddenly
lost all respect, and suffered torments in the thought that he enjoyed
an unfair advantage over his class-mates. The Latin passage happened to
be one which he knew thoroughly well; there was no need, even had he
desired, to 'look it up'; but in sitting down to the examination, he
experienced a sense of shame and self-rebuke. So strong were the
effects of this, that he voluntarily omitted the answer to a certain
important question which he could have 'done' better than any of the
other boys, thus endeavouring to adjust in his conscience the terms of
competition, though in fact no such sacrifice was called for. He came
out at the head of the class, but the triumph had no savour for him,
and for many a year he was subject to a flush of mortification whenever
this incident came back to his mind.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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