Box and Cox: A Romance of Real Life in One Act.Morton, John Maddison
General
Box and Cox: A Romance of Real Life in One Act.
Morton, John Maddison
Comedy plays; English drama -- 19th century
BOX. [_Looking significantly at MRS. BOUNCER._] So it seems! Far be it
from me, Bouncer, to hurry your movements, but I think it right to
acquaint you with my immediate intention of divesting myself of my
garments, and going to bed.
MRS. B. Oh, Mr. Box!
[_Going._
BOX. Stop! Can you inform me who the individual is that I invariably
encounter going down stairs when I'm coming up, and coming up stairs
when I'm going down?
MRS. B. [_Confused._] Oh--yes--the gentleman in the attic, sir.
BOX. Oh! There's nothing particularly remarkable about him, except his
hats. I meet him in all sorts of hats--white hats and black hats--hats
with broad brims, and hats with narrow brims--hats with naps, and hats
without naps--in short, I have come to the conclusion, that he must be
individually and professionally associated with the hatting interest.
MRS. B. Yes, sir. And, by the bye, Mr. Box, he begged me to request of
you, as a particular favor, that you would not smoke quite so much.
BOX. Did he? Then you may tell the gentle hatter, with my compliments,
that if he objects to the effluvia of tobacco, he had better
domesticate himself in some adjoining parish.
MRS. B. Oh, Mr. Box! You surely wouldn't deprive me of a lodger?
[_Pathetically._
BOX. It would come to precisely the same thing, Bouncer, because if I
detect the slightest attempt to put my pipe out, I at once give you
warning that I shall give you warning at once.
MRS. B. Well, Mr. Box--do you want anything more of me?
BOX. On the contrary--I've had quite enough of you!
MRS. B. Well, if ever! What next, I wonder?
[_Goes out at L. C., slamming door after her._
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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