Bringing up the Boy: A Message to Fathers and Mothers from a Boy of Yesterday Concerning the Men of To-morrow — John Shaqi
Bringing up the Boy: A Message to Fathers and Mothers from a Boy of Yesterday Concerning the Men of To-morrowWerner, Carl Avery
Science
Bringing up the Boy: A Message to Fathers and Mothers from a Boy of Yesterday Concerning the Men of To-morrow
Werner, Carl Avery
Boys
A mother said: “It is not necessary for me to strike my child. I compel
him to sit in a chair for one hour without speaking. He fears that
more than the rod.” Of course, he does, poor little chap! And that
mother did not realise that she was substituting a barbaric torture
for mild punishment. I reverse her reasoning: It is not necessary for
me to so torture my boy. Nor shall I deprive him of his play, of the
outside air, of his supper, of anything that makes for his health and
happiness, nor of any good thing that it is in my power to give him.
Disobedience calls for a punishment that is short, direct and
impressive. A sharp tap on the palm of a boy’s hand, or on the calf of
his leg--or two or five or ten--is the only kind of penance I know of
that fills the requirements. It is the one short and sure road to an
immediate result. Naturalists tell us that the sense of touch is the
first experienced by a newborn child. It is the first and quickest wire
from the outer world to the brain. Then come hearing and smelling and
seeing and long after these come the moral perceptions, the power of
deduction and the distinction of right and wrong. My experience has
been that this first sense continues to be the live wire until well on
toward the maturity of the child--if the child is a boy. There are many
men, who can undergo the severest mental torture with calm resolution
and fortitude, but who tremble at the sight of a dental chair. Not
long ago I was chatting with a friend, who is a dentist, when a burly
policeman rushed in, plumped himself into the operating-chair and asked
the dentist to ease his aching tooth. The dentist looked at the tooth
and reached for his forceps. “The only way to fix that is to extract
it,” he said. The officer of the law sprang from the chair like a
jack-in-the-box and made for the door, remarking apologetically as he
went out that he couldn’t spare the time. “That man,” said the dentist,
when he had gone, “has a medal for bravery, and three times has been
commended for saving lives at the risk of his own.”
It is not that the boy fears pain, but that he fears the certainty of
it, he dreads the deliberate, the inevitable punishment, accompanied by
no moral stimulus with which to combat it. I have known my boy to take
a severe beating from another boy in a struggle for the possession of
an apple--and all without shedding a tear. The spat on the hand that
I inflicted was a mere flea-bite to that beating, but because of it I
could leave an apple within reach of his hand indefinitely and, though
he might want it ever so much, he would not touch it if I had forbidden
him.
So much for the psychology of corporal punishment. Now for the practice
of it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account