"No, no!" he exclaimed, vehemently--so vehemently that she knew how his
heart leaped at the thought of it; "you must not sacrifice yourself for
us. What! give up this pleasant home of yours, and all your old
friends?! No; it cannot be."
"There'd be trouble in it," she said; "but it would be a harder trouble
to think of you in foreign parts, with none but savages about you, and
no roof over your head, and wild beasts marauding about."
"Not so bad as that," he interrupted, smiling so cheerfully that her own
face brightened. "There are no wild beasts, and not many natives, and I
shall have a home of my own somewhere."
"I could never sleep at nights," she went on, "or eat my bread in
comfort, for wondering about you. I don't want to be a cost to you; and
when I've sold all, I shall have a little sum of money in hand that will
keep me a year or two after my passage is paid. I'm not too old for work
yet. If it's too bad a place for me to go to, what must it be for you?
And you're not as strong as you ought to be, sir. If anything should
happen to you out there, you'd like to know I was with them you love,
taking care of them."
"It would be a greater comfort than I can tell," said Mr. Chantrey, in a
tremulous voice. "Now and then the thought crosses my mind that I might
die yonder; and what would become of Sophy and Charlie, left so
desolate? There's Warden; but he is too austere and harsh, good as he
is. But, Ann, I ought not to let you come."
"There's no duty to keep me at home," she answered. "If my poor brother
was alive, I could never forsake him, you know; but that is all over
now. And I could have patience with her, poor lady! Aye, I'd have
patience for her own sake as well as yours. She could never try me as
I've been tried. And I've great hopes of her. Maybe if James, poor
fellow, could have broken off all his old ways, and begun again fresh,
turning over a new leaf where folks hadn't seen the old one, he might
have been saved. I've great hopes of Mrs. Chantrey; and nobody could
help her as I could. It seems almost as if our blessed Lord laid this
thing before me, and asked me to do it for his sake. Sure if he asked me
to go all round the world for him, I couldn't say no. To go to New
Zealand with folks I love will be nothing to him leaving heaven, with
his Father and the holy angels there, to live and work like a poor man
in this world, and to die on the cross at the end of all."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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