"It would ha' been better if yew had passed by and let we bide," she
went on; and when Oliver growled his "Shut your noise," it was with less
anger than usual.
"Us could ha' done what us had a mind to then," she said. "This be a
prison."
"We are all in prison, if you can understand me. The walls are all
round, and we cannot get over them."
"'Tis best vor volk to live as 'em be meant to," said Sibley.
And again Searell was amazed. How had this woman obtained the power and
the courage to answer him? And to beat him, for he was beaten. He had no
words to reply to that simple philosophy, and to the woman who appealed
from his decision. He had played the God with them, had brought them out
of chaos, and had given them his commandments; and he was no God, but a
weak man; and they were not his children.
He went back to his books, there were no flowers except Christmas-roses
and snowdrops, shivering things of winter, and tried to dream. Nothing
came. It seemed to him there was less mysticism in his mistland than in
the dirty streets of Stonehouse; and, while he mused, that world came
knocking at his mind, calling in the dialect of Sibley, "'Tis best vor
volk to live as 'em be meant to." His own body, his sluggishness and
unhappiness, convicted him of error; but, if he was wrong, what of all
religion which tells of a God of mysticism, and of his own in
particular, which, at that very season of the year, rejoiced at the
birth of a Child-creator by mysticism not through Love? And at his mind
was hot, red-blooded passion, a crude and awful thing, love for those
things which make men horrible, love for dirt and the roots, not for bud
and bloom; and a contempt and hatred for cold morality and the spells
muttered by candlelight; and the message of the flowers was this:
"Through the agency of others, through the eyes of those who are loved
and loving, not by the confinement of self, souls find the dawn."
"Mrs. Vorse," said Searell one day, the yellow aconites were out, the
first colour of the year, and he was going to look at them, "you have
changed."
Sibley had her back towards him, engaged in cleaning, and she was
wearing, as she always did, the enveloping apron of the country, which
hung from her shoulders and surrounded her body like a sack. He could
not see the flush upon her face.
"Your voice is softer. You sing at your work. You are happy."
"I hain't, master," she whispered. "I feels, master, I wants to be
happy, but I be frightened."
"Of the loneliness?"
"Not that, master. I can't tell ye, but I be frightened."
"You and your husband get along better. You are quieter. I have not
heard you quarrel for some time."
"There's good in Oliver," she said.
"I thought so," he murmured. "But I have not been able to bring it out."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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